week 12 - plum

week 12 started for me on monday.  i was also in kansas city for a sales meeting monday - wednesday.  i was so excited because i wasn't nauseous and felt pretty good! i thought finally, the morning sickness is done!

this morning was my first day back in denver and i threw up twice.  wtf?  now i'm convinced that there's something in my house that i am super sensitive to now that i'm preggo.  but what is it?  there are so many culprits?  the pets, dirty air ducts, scented candles, hidden mold, dirt in general?

this morning i rounded up anything scented and put it in a plastic bin with a tight lid.  i want to get my air ducts cleaned.. but we tried that last summer and the cleaner wouldn't do anything because our HVAC guy installed our furnace wrong.  we're planning to get that fixed, but for now i'd like to just have all the duct work cleaned.  who knows how much filth is in our ducts from our old tenants.

the only place that i think mold might be lurking is in our garage.  i need to have j powerwash the concrete walls to see if we can get rid of it.

the pets i can't really do anything about - although i could brush them more often.  we're putting in sod in the back in the next few weeks, so that should cut down the dirt in general in the house. 

i wonder what else i'm missing?

spring!

i am so thrilled that winter is finally over.  even though we really had a very mild winter, it's still too much for me.  i like being outside and doing yardwork and gardening and not being cold.   so yay to spring!

we spent the weekend cleaning up our backyard, which hasn't seen any kind of gardening tool in probably 10 years.  we (jared) had to cut down a bunch of weed trees and then put them in a mulcher we rented.  it didn't work too well, so we ended up bundling sticks and having a controlled bonfire in the backyard. 

i haven't been feeling too good lately, so mostly i just supervised and watched.  next weekend jared has a huge dirt pile that he has to spread around the yard and then he's going to build some raised beds and i'll finally get to plant all my veggies!  i'm being smart this year and i planned out everything i'm going to plant on a calendar so that nothing will go to waste. 

my mom is coming to visit in a couple of weeks and that has kicked jared into high gear on the house projects.  he finally installed closet doors in the study last week and is about halfway done getting our hall closet in shape.  hopefully the house will feel a little bigger once all of my closets are done and i actually have some storage!

the honey-do list is getting shorter, but it still seems neverending!

an analogy

for me and jared, trying to have a baby is a lot like trying to sell a house.

selling a house
when you first put your house on the market, you think you're going to sell it right away.  it's for sale, you have showings, OF COURSE it will sell.
trying to conceive
when you decide to have a baby, you think you'll get pregnant right away.  you're having unprotected sex, OF COURSE you'll get pregnant.
selling a house
the first month goes by and you've had several showings each week, but no offfers.  that's ok, sometimes it takes a little while.  
trying to conceive
the first month goes by and you've had sex several times each week, but no baby.  that's ok, sometimes it takes a little while.
selling a house
three months go by and you don't have an offer.  even though you have showings and those showings are perfect.  you clean really well and stage the house perfectly. you burn scented candles.  you leave a bowl of candy out for your potential buyers.  you leave soothing classical music playing during the showing. you start to get a little worried.
trying to conceive
three months go by and you aren't pregnant.  even though you have sex when you're ovulating.   you abstain from alcohol and take prenatal vitamins and your husband wears loose boxers.  you start to get a little worried.
selling a house
five months go by and you start researching "how long is an average house on the market".  you read a lot of things that calm you and terrify you at the same time. you realize that some people sell the first week of being on the market, and for others it takes years. you keep doing what you think is right, but you become obsessed.  it's all you and your husband talk about.  
trying to conceive
five months go by and you start researching "how long does it take the average couple to get pregnant".  you read a lot of things that calm you and terrify you at the same time.  you realize that some people will get pregnant the first week of trying, and for others it takes years.  you keep doing what you think is right, but you become obsessed.  it's all you and your husband talk about.
selling a house
several more months go by and you start wondering what else you can do.  you try not to get your hopes up for each showing but are still disappointed when you don't get an offer.  you start getting irritated at well-meaning friends and family that keep telling you to "give it time, it will happen".  then, OMG, you FINALLY get an offer and you're over the moon happy and you feel like all is right in the world.  and it falls through.
trying to conceive
several more months go by and you start wondering what else you can do.  you try not to get your hopes up every month but are still disappointed when you get your period.  you start getting irritated at well-meaning friends and family that keep telling you to "give it time, it will happen".  then, OMG, you FINALLY skip a period and you're over the moon happy and you feel like all is right in the world.  and then it arrives a week late.
selling a house
more months go by and you start to get depressed.  you wonder how you'll be able to live the life you dreamed of if you never sell the house.  you are stressed about it and cannot relax, no matter how many well-intentioned people tell you to.  you are annoyed with people who had no problem selling their house.  you are especially annoyed with people who didn't even want to sell their house, yet someone offered to buy it.  you wonder if you waited too long to sell you house and it will be impossible in this market.   you go to your realtor and say "what is wrong with my house?  is it fixable?  is it unsellable?"  you buy a statue of st. joseph and plant it in your yard and say a prayer because you figure it can't hurt.
trying to conceive
more months go by and you start to get depressed.  you wonder how you'll be able to live the life you dreamed of if you never have children.  you are stressed about it and cannot relax, no matter how many well-intentioned people tell you to.  you are annoyed with people who had no problem getting pregnant.  you are especially annoyed with people who didn't even want to become pregnant, and got knocked up accidentally.  you wonder if you waited too long to try to have a baby and if it will be impossible because you are too old.  you go to your doctor and say "what is wrong with us?  is it fixable?  are we infertile?"  you buy a thermometer and chart your basal body temperature because you figure it can't hurt.
selling a house
just when you've resigned yourself to the fact that maybe you weren't meant to sell your house right now and you start to think that you can stay in that house for a little while longer,  you get a frantic call from your realtor who tells you that the most perfect first time homebuyers LOVE LOVE LOVE your house and they are heading back to the office RIGHT NOW to make an offer. you close and move out and well after the fact you think to yourself "i can't believe i was so worried.. of COURSE we would sell the house!  i can't believe we were so impatient.. these things take time."
trying to conceive
and this is where i can't continue the analogy.. because we are still not pregnant.  but this is what i really hope will finally happen to us - and when we look back on everything, we'll wish we hadn't stressed ourselves out so much because these things totally take time.  we still have 4 more months before we hit the year mark and will be considered for having fertility problems.  i'm hoping we don't make it to that point.. but if we do we'll figure it out then.  

the vortex

here's the picture i promised.

right now we are using it for storage.  when we finally get the money, it will be a beautiful 1000 sq ft with a master suite (including 5 piece bath and walk in closet), study, and tv room.  i'm hoping this happens within the next 2 years.

heating the vortex

our electric/gas bill came in the mail today.  it was $171.18.  i am trying to figure out how it is so high, considering that we keep the house between 60-65 degrees and it has been a relatively warm winter.  right now i am in fleece pj pants, a long sleeve t, slippers, and a heavy duty fleece robe and i am still freezing.

i know it's because we are heating 2000 sq feet of house.  but since we're really only living in 1000 sq feet of house, it doesn't feel like our bill should be twice what i'm used to.

lost yet?

i haven't mentioned this house to the extent of it's importance in our lives, because it is the bane of my existence.  besides the wedding, it was my main topic of conversation in 2010 and i'm a little OVER it, but i will try my best to get you caught up on the story.

the house we are currently living in is a house i bought for the sole purpose of renting it and then eventually selling it.  it was purchased approximately 2 months before the housing market crashed.  luckily it was rented out to section 8 tenants, which meant that my mortgage was paid by the government each month.  things were great for a little while and then the asshole guy that was managing the property for me went crazy and decided that he didn't have to pay the mortgage anymore and we should all buy gold and move to the mountains and live off the grid. so my mortgage wasn't getting paid and i decided that i had to take over the management of the properties (yes, i had two with him - one is currently rented to college kids) and became a landlord overnight.  fun.

so i became a landlord and i thought i should get to know my tenants.  they. were. AWFUL.  11 people living in this house like pigs.  breaking everything.  crap overflowing out of the house.  way too many chihuahuas.  flies.  *shudder*

we had to come over every month to pick up their portion of the rent ($126 - the city payed $1474) and hated it.  these people were the definition of "taking advantage of the system".  the husband worked under the table, the mom was pregnant 24/7, and they were on welfare.  besides continually having children to get more money, they had: cell phones, internet, cable, elitches (6 flags) season passes for ALL of their kids, and there were always empty papa johns pizza boxes piled high on the front porch.  j and i both have jobs and even WE don't regularly splurge on the expensive take out pizza. 

one time when we were over there fixing something, one of their kids was bugging us and hanging on the towel bar in the bathroom, which of course broke.  i looked at him incredulously and said "stop it!  you just broke the towel bar!" to which he nonchalantly replied, "oh that's ok, someone will fix it".  to which i replied, "yeah!  that someone is ME!".

these people always had run ins with the neighbors and cops and i knew they were bad tenants and i didn't like being a slumlord, but if we kicked them out, we would have to find a bunch of money we didn't have to fix up the place before we could get new renters in.  so we just let it be and buried our heads in the sand.

over the next year, we had to deal with a mold problem in the basement which involved insurance companies and unsavory contractors.  a normal tenant might be a little concerned and ask to break their lease due to the mold, which i would, of course, allowed.  but seeing as though these people had been kicked out of 10 houses over the last 10 years, they didn't want to leave.

in july of 2009, i received a phone call from the tenant, crying about how the city was making her move.  the next day, i received a call from the city telling me that they were evicting my tenants for......drum roll please...

living in squalor (!)

yes, that is actually what was written on the eviction notice.

they moved out, we freaked out about having an vacant house and two mortgage payments, and had a few months of  not knowing what to do.  we finally came up with the plan to put our current house on the market (the one i bought in 2005 that i loved dearly but really was too small) and then use any money we made on that house to fix up the vacant rental and live in it.  because it was bigger and would be a more appropriate house for when we started a family.


we put our house on the market in oct 2009 and after 80+ showings, finally sold it in may 2010.  we also made $24k, which doesn't go as far as you think when you're having to completely gut  a 2000 sq ft house.  in fact, it really only gets you about 80% of 1000 sq ft.

then we made really smart decisions, like letting jared quit his (high paying) job to go back to school and were reduced to a single income family. 

it wouldn't be so bad if the basement was just old and needed updating.  but due to the mold problems, the entire basement was removed.  all the floor.  all the drywall.  all the fixtures.  everything.  then a french drain was installed to control the water-table problem.  and a bunch of gravel was shoveled in.  and all the windows were replaced (since we did all the upstairs ones too).  and then, with $8k still sitting in escrow with the mortgage company, everything was halted because we ran out of money and we don't have the $5k required to pour the new basement floor and install the rough in plumbing.

i call it the vortex.  i will take a picture soon and post it.

right now the upstairs of the house is livable.  it's not pretty or finished, but we have working appliances and essential things like doors*.  here is a partial list of the things we still have to do, just so you can get the picture.

• trim the office closet and install closet doors
• mud the inside of the hall closet and install shelf and bar
• install crown molding (moulding?) over the kitchen cabinets
• cover 2x4's in kitchen
• paint kitchen ceiling and window trim
• install doorknob and trim around pantry door
• fill all nail holes and paint trim/baseboard
• caulk around bathroom sink
• finish installing baseboard in kitchen and office
• install kickplates under kitchen cabinets
• fix broken tile in kitchen and regrout floor

that's just a partial list.  so you can see why i get annoyed when jared is watching judge mathis in the middle of the day instead of doing one of the things on his list that is clearly more important to the family.

a year after the house was vacant, you'd think that we would never have to deal with those tenants again.  that's what i thought too.  until i was served** and notified that they were suing me in small claims court for $7500.  more on that story later.

*we did not have interior doors for about 6 weeks.  no bathroom door does not a happy marriage make.
**one month before our wedding, because apparently i didn't have enough going on and had plenty of time to hire attorneys and reschedule court dates and file replies and all other sorts of legal-y stuff.

infestation

our house is being attacked by fruit flies.  they are mostly in the kitchen, but aren't afraid of exploring the bathroom and living room.

it is SO annoying.  and quite embarrassing.  i know i don't clean my house as often as i should, but we are not dirty people, so i really can't understand why we can't get rid of these little buggers.

a few days ago, i put all of our fruit in the fridge and wiped down the counters really well.   then i poured baking soda down the drain, followed with vinegar to let it fizz and clean all the nooks and crannies of the garbage disposal.   and then i poured a whole kettle of boiling water down the drain. 

i have 3 apple cider/saran wrap traps set out to catch them.

we take the trash out every day and have a closed trash can. 

it feels like nothing is working!  any ideas of other places they could be breeding?

omg i suck

it's been a YEAR since my last post?  sorry... this year has been so full of changes and revelations and stress that i think the thought of writing about it (after discussing it with pretty much anyone who would listen) just seemed overwhelming.  but now i realize that instead of talking to *some* people about things, i really should just be writing them down so that i can get it out without subjecting people to listening to my issues.  at least i know that you can just skim the post or skip it if you're not interested!

so.. what has been going on that is so overwhelming, you ask?  where do i begin..?   wedding.  houses.  jobs.  family drama.  friend drama. money.  self esteem. 

wedding.

j and i were married on 5/14/10!   the wedding overall was good (at least people told me they had a good time), although of course it didn't go quite the way i planned.   i'm sure i'll go into more details later - but here's a quick summary.   it snowed and had to be moved inside.  some people created a lot of drama over silly things and it stressed me out.  there were family issues (apparently not attending my wedding is a way to get back at my mom for something she didn't even do).  i didn't feel comfortable in my dress.  BUT, when it was all said and done, i married the love of my life and that's all that matters.  

houses. 

at this time last year, we had 3 houses and one of them was vacant. the vacant one was also trashed and there was no way we could rent it out in it's current condition.  our only solution was to sell the house we were living in.  my first house.  the house i loved and still have a strong attachment to.  we put it on the market in october and after 7 months, 80+ showings, and an offer that fell through, we finally found a buyer.  the day after we returned from our honeymoon (barbados!), we closed and the cutest couple ever took possession of our house.  i was so happy that they were my buyers because they are exactly the type of people i wanted living in my house.   we then moved into the quitman house, which is the one we rent to college kids (it was vacant for the summer) and started fixing up the fenton house (the one that was trashed).   lost yet?  it was insane.  we lived in 3 houses within a 3 month time span.  i don't recommend it. 

so... long story short, we spent all the money we made on the house we sold to put in new windows, appliances, floors, doors, trim, fixtures, etc into the fenton house.  which is now our home.  which i am trying to make the best of even though i would never ever have chosen to live in this house.  it is such a big stress of our lives and one that virtually none of our friends can understand.  right now everything in the house is functional, but not finished.  and it drives me BATTY!  

jobs. 

my job is actually going fantastically.  after not making my goal last year and losing out on a bunch of $$, i am ahead of my goal this year.  which is extremely helpful because j quit his job in september to go back to school.  it a decision that both of us are on board with and one that had to be made.  he's getting his BS in construction management, so i know that it will be very beneficial to our future.  it's just another financial stressor that we have to deal with in order to set us up for success.  being the main breadwinner though... that's a lot of pressure. 

drama.

i don't really want to get into the friend or family drama on this blog because i don't want to add fuel to the fire should these people read this.  let's just say that i am focusing on surrounding myself with individuals that act as positive forces in my life and am disassociating with those who i think are bringing negative energy into my life.   

money. 

one income. too much debt.  2 mortgages. it all piles up and we're having to make some serious choices.  we are cutting back the extras like crazy and it's really hard on my ego to have to admit that even though i make decent money and have an engineering degree and my MBA, i still am not on par financially with my peers due to choices i made, some which were beyond my control. hopefully my frugal forays will be entertaining and useful to you all when i blog about them later. 

and lastly...self esteem. 

i have always struggled with my weight.. but even though i've always been a little chubby, i've been comfortable enough in my skin to not let it be too much of an issue.  that has changed.  i have gained so much weight since the wedding that not only do my clothes not fit, but i don't even recognize myself anymore in pictures.  it's bad.  i don't feel like i went crazy with the fast food or anything (because that's really not my style).. it's just the little things that ad up.  having to eat out because we don't have a kitchen in the house we're fixing up.  not exercising because i have to tile a floor.  being stressed in general.  the past 2 months we've been eating really healthy and i've been getting back into an exercise routine, but the scale hasn't budged. it hasn't gone *up* anymore, which is a good thing, but it hasn't gone down either.  my normal habits at the gym just won't cut it anymore.  the motivation is *almost* there and this will be something that i will try to blog about more so it keeps me accountable. 

so there you go. my 2010 summary.  

my goal for the rest of 2010 is to post at LEAST every other day in december so that i can get back into blogging.  it's good for me.

time to sink some money into the houses

i don't know if i ever mentioned that i am the landlord of two rental houses. the tenants in one of my houses just gave notice and they will be moving out this month, which means that i need to find some new renters. i put ads up all over and actually have a showing tomorrow, so that's great! anyhow, the house is old and a lot of the stuff in it isn't very nice, so we decided that we're going to put some money into it and make it a nicer place to live for the new tenants. here is what we need to do:

• replace carpet in 2 bedrooms and the basement


• paint every room


• install new ceiling light fixtures in bedrooms


• replace bathroom tile, toilet, vanity, mirror, and light fixture in both bathrooms


• repair showers in both bathrooms


• re-tile kitchen floor, install garbage disposal

it's a lot, but we're going to do it now and are looking at it like a practice house-flip. today we went shopping and found the carpet and light fixtures. the carpet place had remnants and we were able to find two matching high quality carpet pieces for the bedrooms. the basement is a different carpet, but the guy gave us a $0.50/sq ft discount. we also paid for installation, because we have no idea how to do it. total for ~400 sq feet of carpet + installation: $777

then we went next door to the lighting place that is moving and having a huge 20%-60% off sale. we bought 2 bathroom light fixtures and the 2 bedroom light fixtures. they were 20% and 40% off and we only paid $110! they would have been well over $200 at home depot, so i think we got a good deal.

i've been looking on craigslist, and between that and the habitat for humanity thrift store, i think we can get the bathroom vanities, cabinets, sinks, toilets, tile etc for pretty cheap.

then i started thinking.. you know, i really don't like the vanity, sink, and cabinet in my bathroom... so i suggested to j that we take those out and put them in the rental house.. then we can get nice ones for us! we might be spending more now than we would just buying cheap ones, BUT we've been wanting to replace ours anyway and now we won't have to buy other ones for one of the bathrooms. he thought that was a good idea, as long as we could find something we liked that was reasonably priced. we want one of those vessel sinks and cabinetry in a dark wood finish.

they are not reasonably priced.

here's an example of one i like.

$665! and that's just for the base.. it doesn't even include the sink.

to make matters more difficult, our bathroom is so tiny that the vanity can't be deeper than 15". that's not very big (standard is 22"). so what i would like to do is find a 15" x 30" cabinet in a dark wood with some drawers or storage space and then drill the holes to install a vessel sink (~$100 for a new one on craigslist) and faucet.

how do i do an internet search for that? i can't figure out what it would be called.. i've tried vanity base, cabinet, and a few other things. i'm not finding what i want. any ideas?

i could always do a pedistal sink, but we have limited storage as it is, so i wanted to avoid that option.

j is planning to take a woodworking class next year. i can't wait until he can just MAKE us what we want.

"so, did your fridge throw up?"

j's response when i told him that i bought some regular high fat peanut butter for the mouse traps.

he likes to make fun of my organic, healthy food.

and i still didn't catch any mice. i will be buying different traps tomorrow.

operation "eek a mouse", day two, failure

since the mice didn't touch the natural organic almond butter i placed in the traps for them 2 nights ago, and since i have been sick and didn't get to the grocery store yesterday, the traps got baited with my laughing cow spreadable lowfat cheese. it's soft and i really smeared it all into the trap so they couldn't just grab it and run.

last night i heard one of the traps snap!

this morning i peered gingerly around the kitchen stove.. and..

NADA. AGAIN.

except that this time, the little fuckers had managed to eat almost all the cheese off of the traps without setting it off. one was practically licked clean. one had been triggered, but it was empty.

they're either really small or really smart.

operation "eek a mouse", day one, failure

i had an exterminator come out to take a look at my mouse problem. they want $600 to spray some "pet safe" chemical (is there such a thing?) outside my house and then trap the mice.

i decided that i would try to do it myself first. since i can't use poison (due to the doggies eating anything in sight, potentially including poisoned mice), i bought a bunch of old school spring loaded mouse traps. last night i baited them and put them all over the kitchen floor, expecting to face several dead mice in the morning.

nada.

my friend thinks it's because i used organic almond butter. it was a toss up between that and laughing cow spreadable cheese. it's all i had.

"them mice ain't that high-falootin'! you need to git yerself some skippy loaded with trans-fat! or better yet, some cheese-whiz!"

when the cat is away..

or in my case, when the dogs are away, the mice DO play!

i am heading out of town today for a business meeting and my dogs are staying with a friend.

just right now, i found a dead mouse in the dog water bowl and not 2 minutes later another one scampered across my floor and is hiding behind my snowboard.

i actually screeched and tried to jump on a chair.

time to call the exterminator, i think.

new house!

simon was a saint and moved us into our new house last week while i was in kansas.

now our lives are completely upside down because:

a) we haven't finished remodeling the kitchen yet, so we have no fridge, oven, microwave, or dishwasher. luckily, we do have a grill.
b) we haven't finished painting yet, so everything is covered in plastic and is essentially a construction zone.
c) simon, bless his heart, didn't label the boxes he packed and so we're relying on his memory to find things.

it will be so nice to be settled!

here's a picture of our house! it was taken in the early spring when we bought it - there are a ton of flowers and things in the front now. =)

where's ty pennington when you need him?

we live in a crappy apartment complex.
oh sure, it looks nice on the website - in the same way that britney looks good on her album cover.
suffice it to say that we're essentially living in a mold infested college dorm.

we decided to buy a house. after days of looking at Houses In Our Price Range (aka Crack Houses), we found one that we love. a 1932 1 bedroom bungalow, with a den and basement and great backyard! it needed a little bit of work, but we were so happy that it was actually livable with all the essentials like floors and walls and a dead squrrel-free kitchen.

once we bought the house, all flaws became glarengly obvious. how will we fit our clothes in these closets? this one-butt kitchen needs to be at least a butt and a half. hey, what's that big burn mark on the hardwood floor? wow, is all this electrical work original?
we decided that we'd do some remodeling.

the closet was first. we thought: "we just have to knock down a wall, build a new wall, add a light and a door, paint it and we're good to go! this should only take 1, 2 weekends at the most".
we quickly discovered that the real world is not the same as an episode of trading spaces.

we started the project by heading to home depot and got out of there 4 1/2 hours and several hundred dollars later.

it's been three weeks and the closet still isn't done.

list of major items that still need to be done in the 7 weeks before we move in
- old coal chimney knocked out
- 2 doorways removed
- new appliances and cabinets installed in kitchen (including a dishwaster, which currently doesn't exist)
- moulding in bedroom replaced
- walls in every room painted

it's totally worth it.