fired

i had never been fired before in my life, until today.

last night i got cut from my shift because i had a "bad attitude". i don't disagree with them, but i talked to the manager about the reasons behind my attitude (we were overstaffed and everyone was bored and not making any money. plus i felt that 2 people were being snappy with me and treating me unfairly - one of those being his wife). i told him that i was stressed with school at the moment and i would change my attitude and hang in there until we got busy again. problem solved, so i thought.

then i get a phone call today saying that he talked it over with his wife and they think it's best to terminate our relationship. WTF? i can't have ONE bad day? ONE bad day which i apologized for? it seems like they were looking for a reason to get rid of me and i'm not sure why. i have never had any other complaints and am one of the best servers they have. the only thing i can think of is that i don't quite fit in with the other staff (all 20 yr old college students that are stoned on the job half the time and like to goof around a lot). i also wasn't afraid to speak my mind when i didn't think things were going well and i don't think they liked that.

i am a little shocked but i'm trying to stay positive and hope it is for the better.

don't sit in my section

while doing some research for my final project this semester, i came across this disturbing, albeit entertaining blog entry. be sure to read the comments and her replies.

crazy restaurant customer

talk about having some control issues.

lady, here's the thing. you're expecting 5 star service from a 2 star restaurant. you think that just because most people like something, doesn't mean the server should assume YOU like it, and that the server is wasting their time and being inefficient. i think it's more inefficient to not make assumptions about the 99% of customers that would like a refill of the same drink they've been drinking.

and seriously, WHO orders 4 sides of ranch? if you were rude to me for not bringing you enough, i would probably bring out a soup bowl full and sweetly say "is this enough ranch for you ma'am?" so that you would at least look stupid in front of the other customers.

you also state that you don't care about the servers name or the specials. if you so obviously don't care about the server and the restaurant, then why should the server care about you? studies have shown that introducing yourself to the table and telling customers about the specials actually increases the tip percentage.

if i did everything you suggested, i would risk pissing off 99% of my other customers.

if you're so picky about everything, maybe you should stay home and cook your own goddamned food.

here's a tip

so i recently took on a second job because:
1) since the divorce, my living expenses have doubled and i've drained my safety cushion so i need more money
2) i was going out and spending way too much money on food and alcohol that my body doesn't need
3) i had too much free time on my hands and was getting lazy
4) if i want my dream of owning a record label to come true, i need to get my debt taken care of and start saving money NOW.

i found a server position with this cute little mom and pop restaurant not too far from my house. family run, great food, good neighborhood joint. i had been a server before in college and always liked it - the client interaction, the exercise, the atmosphere. in the misdt of my nostalgia, i forgot about the cheap customers, endless side work, and aching feet.

i want to start this rant by thanking all the friendly customers who know how to tip and don't run me ragged in the process. also, thank you to those that may run me around a lot, but realize you're doing so and make up for it in the tip. you are the minority, but please know that you are remembered and the level of service that you get each time you come in will only get better. i will remember your names, what kind of wine you like, that you don't care for croutons, and will allow you to order the salmon you love, even though it's not on the menu anymore.

now, for those of you that don't fall into the above category. i have no idea if you're cheap bastards or just clueless, but here is a brief overview of tipping ettiquite as well as some insight into the life of a server.

*anything between 10%-15% is NOT an acceptable tip. when you leave that amount, you are telling the server that they did a bad job. one rare exception - if you don't order any drinks or need a refill on your water, order one simple entree, eat and pay quickly and don't leave a mess, then 10%-15% is understandable, although still a little cheap.

*anything less than 10% is an INSULT. ESPECIALLY when you suck down your drinks like you're in the desert, requiring your server to fill them every 30 seconds, order appetizers, soup (which of course isn't hot enough and can i have more crackers?), salad (no onions, or croutons, extra tomatoes, extra dressing), an entree (with special requests), dessert, coffee (with frequent "warm ups"), sit there for 2 hours, and then tip $6 on a $90 ticket, all while telling me what a great job i am doing for you.

*I AM NOT YOUR SLAVE. I AM MAKING $2.50 AN HOUR AND DEPEND ON YOUR PROPER TIPS FOR MY WAGES. whoever thinks that servers should be paid by their employers need to realize that YES, that SHOULD be the way it is, but it ISN'T so please just deal with it. your food costs would be astronomical if the restaurant was paying it's servers $10-$15 an hour with paid vacation and sick leave and health insurance. when you go to a restaurant, social conventions state that you are agreeing to tip the appropriate amount. If you can't afford to spend at least %15 of your bill to pay your server for all the time she spent with you, then maybe you should order the proper amount of food that will fit into your budget, or not eat out at all.

*did you know that I have to report 8% of my total sales for tax purposes? did you know that i have to tip out the bartender 5% of my tips and the busser 10% of my tips? that $2 you left on a $25 ticket doesn't stretch so far then, does it?

*COUPONS. i love coupons - i use them all the time. HOWEVER, you should tip on the amount of the food BEFORE the coupon is subtracted. i am AMAZED at how many people don't understand this concept! just because you get 50% off of your dinner, does NOT mean that i worked 50% less to serve it to you.

*being old is no excuse for being cheap. there are plenty of old people who know how to tip well. a dollar does not go as far not as it did in yoru day, ma'am. and the sweet little smile and the way you say "and here's a little something extra for you, dear" does not make up for the fact that you tipped me 5%.

*if you're old and you call me sweetheart or dear or honey, i don't mind, really. i know i look young for my age, but i'm nearly 30 and being called "kiddo" by someone in my peer group (especially another woman) is a little insulting.

*please don't be condensending to me. here's a newsflash - most people in the serving industry are working it as their SECOND job. they are in school or an artist or starting their own business or just need a little extra cash. the majority are not stupid or uneducated or working there because they can't get another job. i have a chemical engineering degree, am working on my MBA, and am saving money to start up my own business - what have you done with your life? yeah, that's what i thought. amazing how people change their attitude towards me when they learn that i am actually a successful person.

*being "math-challenged" is not an excuse to leave a bad tip. it is actually very easy to approximate the tip. tax at my restaurant is 8.1%, so if you just take the tax amount and double it, that should be your minimum base. or, you can do what i do, which is take the amount of the ticket, round up to the nearest $5, take 10% and double it (so a $34.54 ticket would be - 10% of $35 = $3.50 x 2 = $7)

and here are some non-tip related tips to make our transaction run smoother.

*if you do have a god-blessed coupon, please present it to me sometime before i give you the bill.

*if you are ready for me to take your payment, please put the credit card in the slot of the folder and put it on the edge of the table so that i can see it. unfortunately, i don't have x-ray vision and if i don't see the credit card sticking out, i will assume that you are not ready to pay yet. if you're paying with cash and want change, let the bills stick out a little bit so i know they're in there.

*if you want a drink refill, please put your glass near the edge of the table so that i can see it better.

*if you are done eating and want me to clear your plate, please put your silverware on top of the plate and put the plate slightly to the side. then i know that you're not still "working on it".

i know it may not seem like it from this rant, but i am actually a very good server! i always have a smile on my face, i don't judge you when you walk in the door (unless you've been in before and i know you're a cheapskate), i keep your drinks refilled, i accomidate any kind of special requests you may have (luckily the chef likes me), and i try to read you to see if you like to joke around or just want to eat and leave. i truely appreciate all the great customers and love serving you guys. i just want to try to get the word out to the people that don't know any better, because it is really frusturating to know that you're doing a really good job and then not get adequately compensated. it seems like this is something that has been the bane of servers everywhere for years and years and years, and for those in the biz, it's something we have to deal with every day.

if you want to read more about the plight of waiters and waitresses everywhere, check out these sites:

stainedapron.com
bitterwaitress.com
waiterrant.blogspot.com

bummer on the range

so i'm in casper, wy right now. i used to have to come up here about 4 times a year when i worked for ERM. it's kind of weird being up here and not having to go take samples from a hidden water well in a railyard.

the last time i was up here, i found one of the best secret shopping meccas ever. the gap clearance store. this wasn't just an outlet, this was where all the clearance merchandise from gap, banana republic, and old navy came to die. it was awesome. and has now been replaced by a ross.

sigh. i really needed some cheap khakis and tank tops for mexico and baby gifts.

i had my first conference call in my jammies

and it rocked.

so THAT'S why i couldn't find it..

so i am doing field work right now, in the lovely metropolis of casper, wy.

i was here a few months ago and commented earlier that at least i have good restaurants and a free wifi connection. although having good restaurants didn't stop me from getting a martha's vineyard salad from arby's for dinner yesterday (it's so good though - and arby's is as blue as it's gets!) and room service from the crappy restaurant in my not-so-crappy hotel. room service is just not very glamorous when your salad looks like something you get at a denny's in arkansas and the shrimp in your shrimp cocktail have a weird slimy texture. but i digress.

so good things and bad things about being in casper.
bad things:
-it downpoured on me yesterday while i was measuring water levels in monitoring wells. which resulted in me having to don my sorority windbreaker and curse under my breath.
-i spent three hours looking for a well that i needed to sample. and after talking with an adjacent property owner, discovered that they PAVED over it. no amount of diggin' on my part will ever uncover that bad boy.
-i ate slimy shrimp
-hard hats and orange vests really don't do much for me
-spiders lurking in well vaults
-smelling like diesel at the end of the day
-when i realized that i accidently used the zeroing vaccum tube while field testing for iron; and of course i had no spares (i won't try to explain..i'd be surprised if you know what i'm talking about and aren't in the industry)
-driving by the dick cheney federal building on the way to the job site

good things:
-i have a high speed wifi connection so i can do my homework (wait.. is that good or bad?)
- i actually did said homework and won't have it lingering over my head all week.
-i discovered a "GAP CLEARANCE" store at the mall here.. and it rocks! for $100 i got: 4 work skirts, pair of workout pants, sleep shorts, 1 cami, 2 baby gifts, and 4 maternity dresses (to sell on ebay - not for me!). there are only 3 of these stores in the whole country! they do banana republic, gap, and old navy items. and the place is freakin' huge with racks and racks and racks of clothes!
- i don't have to go to the gym because i get a better workout lifting 5 gallon pails of water and various other equipment in and out of the truck and i'm on my feet all day.
- i have a 2 minute commute to the job site
- i get to charge travel time
- i am reimbursed for the few thousand i'll put on my credit card, AND i get to keep the miles! (and earn hotel points)
-giving the dick cheney federal building the finger as i drive past

hop aboard the mole train*

for those of you that don't know, i'm a chemical engineer. don't ask me why, it just kind of happened.

anyway, i work as an environmental consultant, and i've usually only had to do wussy chemical engineering stuff, like sizing a pump or figuring out head loss**.

but today i was asked to do some HARD CORE chemical engineering and you'd think, from my silent internal fuming, that my boss asked me to perform brain surgery with a rubberband and plastic knife.

maybe i'm not in the right career path when i get pissy about being expected to do the thing i was hired for.

* if you understand this title than you are either a big dork like me, or you also had mr. nelson for 12th grade chemistry.

**which i still had a hard time with intially, until i found a cool little website calculator that does it for me. hooray for technology!