about me

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Denver, Colorado, United States
i'm 33. i live with my husband, baby daughter 2 dogs and 1 kitty. i'm a chemical engineer with an MBA and work in technical sales. i tend to bite off more than i *think* i can chew and end up with a full bulging mouth for awhile before i can finally swallow. i thrive in chaos, but strive for order.

11.29.2007

top ten turn-offs on your online profile

10. a picture of your car/truck/motorcycle
at 30, i assume that any man i date would have a car or some means of transportation. you don't need to prove it to me before I even meet you. i also do not think that a crotch rocket or harley is sexy, especially if you feel the need to show it off.

9. the word "cuddle" or any variation thereof
this is just cheesy. let's assume that the majority of the people like to cuddle when they're dating. no need to state the obvious. you will probably just attract women who like cuddling more than sex - and then you'll bitch about it.

8. claiming to be into any kind of music. (except rap or country, of course)
this just tells me that you have no taste in music and all my nerdy band rambling will be met with a blank stare and then the statement "well, i really though nicklebacks last album was fantastic!"

7. referring to women as "ladies", or even worse, "ladys" or "lucky lady"
again, CHEESY.

6. raving about a chain restaurant
if you get that excited about the olive garden, i can guarantee that we will not get along.

5. stating your height/weight/hair color/eye color even when it's already listed on the profile
being so OBVIOUS makes you look retarded.

4. proclaiming how active you are "i like to run, mountain bike, row, ski, snowboard, hike, rock climb, swim, play volleyball, and do yoga. i want to meet a girl who can keep up with me".
Do these guys have any idea how many women there are in the world who are this active? Like 10. and i can guarantee that they are too busy to be looking for dates online.

3. complaining about all the places you can't meet women
most people online are there because they are too busy or haven't had luck meeting people at the normal places. you don't need to state it.

2. posting a picture that doesn't clearly show your face
a cute face is much much more important than a nice body. one of the differences between the sexes that will probably never change.

1. wanting your lady to "be comfortable in jeans or an evening gown"
other similar cliches include "i like going out, and also staying in"; "i like listening to music and watching movies". THANK YOU CAPTAIN OBVIOUS. EVERYONE LIKES THESE THINGS. THEY DO NOT MAKE YOU UNIQUE.

1 comment:

  1. Lady. Uch. "Ladies" are over 60 and hang out with my mom.

    ReplyDelete