about me

My photo
Denver, Colorado, United States
i'm 33. i live with my husband, baby daughter 2 dogs and 1 kitty. i'm a chemical engineer with an MBA and work in technical sales. i tend to bite off more than i *think* i can chew and end up with a full bulging mouth for awhile before i can finally swallow. i thrive in chaos, but strive for order.


the 4 worst words in our language

"let's just be friends"

i have a lot of guy friends. there's a reason for that.
most of them have uttered the 4 words above.

it all goes the same way.
kt, we need to talk about things.
followed by a sad smile.
my heart skips a beat, i think oh crap, and i know exactly what is coming.
you are an amazing girl
i love hanging out with you
you'll find the right guy for you
i really want to keep hanging out with you
i'm just not ready for a girlfriend right now

and i smile at them and tell them i understand and sure, we can be friends. and on the inside i'm thinking.. if i am such a f'ing cool girl, then why the hell don't you want to date me? what is wrong with me? we have fun together. we're attracted to each other. i don't smother you or get jealous or go crazy. your friends like me. i'm honest and caring and supportive and a fantastic girlfriend.

while my heart is being crushed, my head is telling me that it wouldn't have worked out anyway.. you weren't into them; you were worried about his lifestyle anyway; you knew it wasn't going where you wanted..

i'm used to my heart battling my head. i'm just not used to having it lose so often.


  1. ah, that sucks. but there's NOTHING wrong with you! there are great guys that just aren't great for you. you'll find one. really. I may not, but you will... ;-)

  2. oh i know. love can hurt more than most anything i think.

    but I'm sorry...dont' get frustrated and be Mae West. She never cries over any man; she just says "next!"