fluffy puffy puppy

thrifty finds 1-15-12

2012-01-17T15:00:00.000-07:00

my local savers was having 50% off for the holiday this weekend, so i ventured down there to look at baby clothes. $57 later I left with:

6 pairs of jeans for charlotte (gap, old navy, childrens place)
3 pairs of jeans for mommy (old navy, levi)

2 sweatshirts and a sweater for charlotte

3 onsies

2 pairs PJs and one skirt

shoes for mommy

3 sweaters for mommy

And the outfit she's wearing today!

adjusting

2012-01-16T11:02:00.000-07:00

i am now a full time working mom with a house husband. except i work from home, so this is a more difficult task than i thought it would be. when i was working from home before the baby, i had a pretty good routine. i could work at my kitchen table to whatever background noise i wanted - tv (rarely, but sometimes), music, or silence. if i needed to take a little break, i would throw in a load of laundry or unload the dishwasher or vacuum the endless tufts of pet hair. then when i was on maternity leave, instead of taking care of my clients, i was taking care of charlotte. and i would basically do chores around the house in the same way.

since our house is so ~~cramped~~ cozy, i don't have a place where i can shut the door and work. thus i am subjected to whatever background noise jared has, which is usually the tv or the baby crying. of course this lends itself to distraction.

another thing i'm adjusting to is losing control over the way the house looks. while i love that jared is making a good effort to keep it clean, the way he does things is not the way i would and it's hard for me to accept. for example, i would rather the whole house look picked up, rather than the kitchen spotless and the bedroom a disaster. however, jared would rather have one area appear perfect and close the door to the other areas. another example, i'm ok with having a folded dishtowel, blender, or neat stack of bills on the kitchen counter, while jared wants absolutely nothing there. i keep telling myself to just let him do things his way because it's his job now but that is SO hard.

if i was gone all day, i think i could handle it better. but since i'm home, i am watching how he's doing things and notice all the differences. how much longer it takes him to do something. putting something away in the wrong place. ignoring the dryer when it buzzes. taking too many tv breaks. it is a herculean effort for me to bite my tongue and focus on work.

i do have an office space in a building that i use occasionally and i have been spending more time there. but i don't like that as much either. it's nice to take a 10 minute break and snuggle with charlotte, and it's better for me to be home every 3-4 hours so i can feed her and we don't go through my extra milk supply too quickly.

i know that it's silly to complain about these things because i'm sure most people would LOVE to be able to work from home and have their husband do the housework. i just need to adjust my thinking and let myself let things go and i'm sure i will be much happier.

birth plan?!?! bwhahahhaa!

2011-11-19T10:51:00.000-07:00

our little daughter is finally here! charlotte was born on 11-02-2011 at 5:24pm. 7lb 10oz, 20 3/4" isn't she precious?

she is such a good baby, which is nice since her birth did not go quite as planned.

on 11-1, i went to my regular doctors appointment. my blood pressure was high and i had protein in my urine. they sent me straight to L&D to be monitored because of preeclampsia. when my blood pressure refused to go down, they suggested induction. i refused at first, and then was basically told that i didn't really have a choice, due to the risk of organ failure, seizure, and death. at 4:30pm, they gave me misoprostol, a drug that helps ripen the cervix. i got another dose at 8:30, and then the contractions started. they weren't too bad, but they definitely kept me awake all night. the next morning, i was only 2 cm dilated and so they decided to start the pitocin.

unfortunately, pitocin makes your contractions incredibly strong and painful - your body doesn't have a chance to gradually get used to them. because of this, i decided i needed an epidural. unfortunately, i am one of those rare people that doesn't respond to epidurals, which i figured out after getting 2 of them. at this point, i'm in extreme pain with no pain relief and i feel the urge to push. it's more than an urge - it's an involuntary reaction. oh and did i mention that she's posterior, so i'm having back labor? so i'm pushing and there's no progress. apparently she's stuck up there - every time she moves forward a little, she slips back in. the nurse tries to reposition her, but nothing is working. then they doubled my dose of pitocin to try to make the contractions even stronger. after 2 hours of pushing, i couldn't take it anymore. i begged the doctor to shut off the pitocin and told them i was ready for a c-section.

once that decision was made, things happened rather quickly and charlotte was born an hour later. while i was incredibly disappointed that the birth didn't go as planned, i made peace with it and was glad that the medical intervention was available since i needed it.

luckily, i have recovered quickly from the surgery. i think it is because i had the placenta encapsulated and have been taking them daily. nursing has been very easy, which is a relief because i thought i would have problems. i've also already lost all the baby weight (50 pounds in one week!! most of it was water retention), so that's been nice to not have to worry about.

and most importantly, charlotte is very healthy and the most perfect baby ever!! :)

the finish line is in sight

2011-10-14T09:45:00.000-06:00

on monday i will be 37 weeks pregnant. that is considered FULL TERM, which means that i could technically have a baby a week from now. it still blows my mind, even though i've had 9 months to prepare.

the pregnancy has been ok for me. the first 17 weeks were rough because i was SO sick all the time. then when i hit the 2nd trimester, i started to feel better but had to contend with nasty seasonal allergies and sinus infections. july and august were actually pretty good - i had energy and no adverse symptoms. but ever since then i have just been more and more uncomfortable. i'm have a LOT of swelling in my hands, feet, and calves. the swelling in my hands, combined with carpal tunnel, has made 4 fingers on each hand completely numb. it gets worse at night and in the morning i can't even make a fist. then they loosen up a bit during the day, but i still have no feeling. add that to the fact that my belly is now huge, and the simplest things have become crazy hard to do. like putting on socks and shoes. getting off the couch. picking things up from the floor.

j and i took a 6 week natural childbirth class that has really helped prepare us, and has lessened my anxiety about birth quite a bit. i'm actually looking forward to it - because i know that once i get through it i will finally be able to hold my baby! i've started to not tell people i'm planning a natural, unmedicated birth because they look at me like i have 3 heads and start asking me why i don't believe in modern medicine. it is too much to ask for people to respect your decision? I don't get all over their case for being induced or getting an epidural, because i believe that each woman has to do what is right for them. it would be nice if others would extend that same courtesy..

1st anniversary weekend

2011-05-15T09:53:00.001-06:00

to celebrate our first wedding anniversary, jared and i decided to take a trip to san diego. we chose san diego for several reasons. #1) we had $300 american airlines vouchers from when we gave up our seats for our honeymoon last year, and the only direct flight for <$300 from denver on american airlines was to los angeles. #2) we wanted to go somewhere warm and we have good friends in san diego.

it was a good decision. however, it turns out that jared and i cannot travel anywhere without scores of drama related to the trip. like when we went to napa for a friends wedding and experienced the following:
*a flat tire
*a broken GPS which resulted in calling the hotel for directions from san francisco and trying to get there in rush hour
*a fall that led to a *very* swollen and sprained ankle
*a cell phone left in the rental car on the way home

although so many things went wrong, that trip to napa was very fun and we had a blast!

this trip was similar.
it started out thursday night. our flight was at 7:30. jared got home from work and we left to take the dogs to our friends around 4:45. then we had to drop off jareds homework assignment and we headed to the airport around 5:30. we hit very heavy traffic and when we got to the parking lot, we were in a hurry to get on the shuttle. i left my phone in the car and they had to send another shuttle to bring it to me. by the time i get my phone, we had about 1 hour until our flight left. we head to security, but that security checkpoint is closed. we have to go to the one clear on the other side of the airport, which of course has a long line. it takes us 35 minutes to get through security. we rush to the gate and have a few minutes to spare before they start boarding. phew.

right before take off, i turn to jared and ask "you locked the door, right?". he couldn't answer me.. normally, i would have just assumed that everything was fine, but for SOME REASON i decided to text my friend stacey who lives close to us and have her go double check. we were taking off, but i had this urge to text her right then and not when we got to LA. once we landed, i had a text from her "call me when you land, it's important".

i called her and found out that our front door was WIDE OPEN. apparently, in the rush to get out of the house and round the dogs up into the car, jared had forgotten to go back and SHUT THE DOOR. i had a pit in my stomach as i asked her if everything had looked ok. to my relief, she said that it didn't look like we had been robbed and she turned on a light and deadbolted the door for us. thank god for friends like her.

after landing in LA and going through a seemingly endless amount of shuttles, we finally get to the rental car place.   then after missing a turn and driving through south central LA, we finally get to our hotel, which was paid for with hotel points. it was nice and we crashed.

the next day was fairly uneventful, disaster wise. we enjoyed a nice drive down the pacific coast highway, chilled on a beach for an hour or so, and finally made it down to our friends house in san diego.

saturday, our friends took us sightseeing in la jolla. we were at the la jolla cove, walking on the rocks and looking at the tide pools.   my first mistake was that i was wearing my chucks, which don't have a lot of traction, so even though i was being super careful, i stepped on a slimy patch on the rock and lost my balance. everything went into slow motion. my butt hit the rock and i thought i was safe.. but then i slowly slid backwards into the tide pool. i knew it was coming and there was nothing i could do except moan "nooooooooo!" as i was going in.    this was quite entertaining for jared and my friends, as you can imagine. i got up, soaking wet, and had no choice but to see the humor in the situation and laugh with everyone else.

saturday night we checked into our super fancy hotel (our splurge because the rest of the trip was so cheap). it didn't disappoint. if you are ever in san diego and want to drop $300 a night on a hotel, i highly recommend the Hotel Solamar in the gaslamp district. we got one of the spa rooms and it was amazing. for dinner we decided that we wanted to take advantage of being near the water and nothing sounded better than a big bucket of crab legs. the hotel clerk recommend this place called the crab hut, about 6 blocks from our hotel. while walking there, my sandals that i hadn't properly broken in yet for the summer, start cutting me so bad that i can barely walk. i had to stop in the cvs and buy the only pair of flip flops that didn't rub on the cuts - and they were men's. we get to the crab hut, but we can't get in, because there has been a shooting next door at the marriot and everything is taped off with crime scene tape.

so we get directions to another seafood place, which is about 8 blocks in the opposite direction. this place turns out to be more of a fast food fish place where everything is fried. not really our idea of a nice romantic anniversary dinner. we then remember that jared's mom suggested a place called "Anthony's Fish Grotto", which is right on the water. she raved about it and said it was the best seafood she's ever had. we look it up on google and it has a good rating, so we decide to check it out. we should have paid more attention to the look the hotel front desk clerk gave us when we mentioned it.

we drive to anthony's and walk inside. the whole way there i was reading some of the reviews on yelp and it sounded like the atmosphere was not going to be quite what we were looking for. it was going to be another blue parrot*. when we're going to our table, jared was focused on the great view of the water from the restaurant. i was focused on the crowded, noisy dining room filled with tourists, families, and fried food - and the decor that hasn't been updated since 1984. we sit down, and look at the menu. NOTHING looks good and the prices seem pretty expensive for atmosphere and type of food. we order water and look at the menu some more. i look up at jared with pleading eyes.. and i ask him if we can leave. we hightail it out of there, even though by this time it's 8pm and we are starving and tired.

we head back to our hotel and walk to this place we had noticed earlier. it was called lou & mickey's and it was a steakhouse/seafood place with a great atmosphere and prices similar to what we would have paid at anthony's.   this ends up to be a very good decision. we have a private table and are able to enjoy a very nice meal and good conversation, which is how a 1st anniversary dinner should be.

it is now sunday and i'm typing this while jared is still sleeping. today is our last day - our flight is at 8:30 tonight. we plan to spend the rest of the morning in san diego and then drive up to LA and check out hollywood and some tourist things before we leave. hopefully it will be fun, but uneventful.. although knowing us, i'm sure something funny will happen that will give us another good story.. which is pretty much the way things always go with our relationship and marriage. and i don't think i'd have it any other way.

*when jared and i first started dating, he would RAVE about this italian restaurant called the blue parrot. he took me there on a date, and i was less than impressed. the atmosphere was like a cafeteria in a nursing home and the food wasn't that good (although it wasn't horrible). it was then when jared started understanding the importance of ambiance and atmosphere when dining out for a special occasion.

utterly unmotivated

2011-05-05T09:13:00.000-06:00

these past few months have been weird. i have absolutely no motivation for the following:

work
cleaning the house
working on house projects
exercising
being with friends
eating
shopping
crafts
computer games
internet surfing
watching tv or movies
reading
taking dogs to park

i just don't want to do anything. nothing fun, nothing satisfying, nothing indulgent. but i also don't want to just lay around on the couch or sleep - that makes me feel even worse because the hours just go by so slowly. i have never experienced this before for long periods of time. i am normally SOO busy that my days fly by and i can't fit everything that i want to do into them. now it's just the opposite.

i attribute most of it to being nauseous and/or tired all day, but i'm starting to wonder if some sort of depression is creeping up on me. i don't *think* i feel depressed.. but who knows. i'm going through so many changes with the pregnancy, maybe this is one of them?

week 12 - plum

2011-04-28T09:08:00.000-06:00

week 12 started for me on monday. i was also in kansas city for a sales meeting monday - wednesday. i was so excited because i wasn't nauseous and felt pretty good! i thought finally, the morning sickness is done!

this morning was my first day back in denver and i threw up twice. wtf? now i'm convinced that there's something in my house that i am super sensitive to now that i'm preggo. but what is it? there are so many culprits? the pets, dirty air ducts, scented candles, hidden mold, dirt in general?

this morning i rounded up anything scented and put it in a plastic bin with a tight lid. i want to get my air ducts cleaned.. but we tried that last summer and the cleaner wouldn't do anything because our HVAC guy installed our furnace wrong. we're planning to get that fixed, but for now i'd like to just have all the duct work cleaned. who knows how much filth is in our ducts from our old tenants.

the only place that i think mold might be lurking is in our garage. i need to have j powerwash the concrete walls to see if we can get rid of it.

the pets i can't really do anything about - although i could brush them more often. we're putting in sod in the back in the next few weeks, so that should cut down the dirt in general in the house.

i wonder what else i'm missing?

week 7 - blueberry

2011-04-12T16:31:00.000-06:00

i'm now at the point where i am no longer fearing that any slight move i make will make me miscarriage. right now i just want the first trimester to pass so that i can stop feeling hungover 24/7. yes, i'm one of the lucky ones who has had all-day nausea. i hit a wall at about 3pm every afternoon as well, so my days seems to consist of lying on the couch, eating saltines, sipping tea, and napping. all while wanting to hurl, but not being able to.

the baby is the size of a blueberry and that's what jared and i have been calling it. "do you think this will hurt the blueberry, or am i ok?" "our little blueberry says thank you for giving it some closet doors!" "please, little blueberry, you're killing mommy with these hormones!"

i'm amazed at how fast it's growing. poppy seed --> sesame seed --> tic-tac --> blueberry. next week the nickname will change to our little raspberry.

right now it's waving it's little arm and leg buds around - and that just blows my mind.

we haven't told our parents yet because my mom is coming to visit at the end of the month and we want to tell her in person. it's killing us! i nearly slipped when she called me yesterday. i also have a little anxiety because we've told a lot of our friends and i'm a little worried they're going to say something on facebook and my mom will KILL me if she finds out that way!

speaking of anxiety. i had it when i thought i couldn't get pregnant, and now that i am, it's just manifesting itself in other ways. i'm slightly terrified of the labor part of things... in a "there's no going back now" sort of way. it's how i felt when i went skydiving, and that didn't have a pretty ending (or video!). i'm reading too much for my own good, but i also know i have to. it's in my nature to be prepared for absolutely any little thing that could possibly happen.

i'm even more terrified of the idea of having someone be entirely dependent on me for so long! i know that we will be good parents and whatnot, but the whole idea of PERMANENT parenthood seems so daunting!

then there's our house and finances. i simply don't know how we're going to afford things like day care. or college. even the co-payment on the insurance.

i'm SOOO happy that this is happening, but i am in total fear of the unknown.

finally!

2011-04-12T16:26:00.000-06:00

so remember when i posted my analogy about selling our house and trying to have a baby?

well, we finally have an offer!!

baby rockman will be joining us sometime around 11/7/11. i'm 10 weeks right now, and right in the middle of all the lovely morning sickness symptoms..

i have a post that i wrote when i was 7 weeks, but didn't publish at the time.

spring!

2011-03-21T09:08:00.000-06:00

i am so thrilled that winter is finally over. even though we really had a very mild winter, it's still too much for me. i like being outside and doing yardwork and gardening and not being cold. so yay to spring!

we spent the weekend cleaning up our backyard, which hasn't seen any kind of gardening tool in probably 10 years. we (jared) had to cut down a bunch of weed trees and then put them in a mulcher we rented. it didn't work too well, so we ended up bundling sticks and having a controlled bonfire in the backyard.

i haven't been feeling too good lately, so mostly i just supervised and watched. next weekend jared has a huge dirt pile that he has to spread around the yard and then he's going to build some raised beds and i'll finally get to plant all my veggies! i'm being smart this year and i planned out everything i'm going to plant on a calendar so that nothing will go to waste.

my mom is coming to visit in a couple of weeks and that has kicked jared into high gear on the house projects. he finally installed closet doors in the study last week and is about halfway done getting our hall closet in shape. hopefully the house will feel a little bigger once all of my closets are done and i actually have some storage!

the honey-do list is getting shorter, but it still seems neverending!

emotional intelligence

2011-03-11T09:21:00.000-07:00

i've always thought i was a pretty good salesperson. it's what i do for a living, i like it, and so far i've been pretty successful. it was review time for work last week and i went into my review thinking "i'm 112% of goal! i did a good job! they love me!" the actual review was waaaay different and i was kind of caught off guard.

while it was acknowledged that i reached my goal, far more time was spent on all the things i did wrong. i didn't have enough meetings. i'm not hitting my potential. i felt like jennifer anistons character in office space when she's being lectured by her boss about how many pieces of flair she needs to wear.

after getting off of the call and bursting into tears (which i was amazingly able to hold back during the call), i thought about it a little and realized that my boss was just trying to motivate me. but he has NO idea how i am actually motivated. he's treating me the way he would want to be treated, instead of treating me the way i want to be treated.

i've been reading a lot about emotional intelligence lately and how it is a much larger factor in success than IQ is. the book i'm reading right now is how to sell with emotional intelligence and it has been very helpful for me to learn about my traits and why i find some other people SO annoying or hard to get along with.

i scored pretty evenly in all categories - the range was from 12-48. My dominant personality is that of "motivator" (35), and my secondary is "enterpriser" (34). the two that were equally my lowest were "togetherness" and "analyzer" (32). i think this will help me recognize other people better and conscientiously adjust my personality so that i don't irritate them.

here are a few of the traits - which one are you?

A larger version of this chart can be found here.

food fight

2011-02-17T14:55:00.000-07:00

i've heard somewhere that the top three things couples argue about are money, sex, and work. what is the main thing that j and i seem to argue about?

FOOD.

some back story. j has always been a very picky eater. he hates vegetables. his sister hates vegetables. his dad hates vegetables. and even though his mom likes vegetables, she never made the rest of them eat any.

when i met him, the only things he ate were:
pizza. spaghetti. ham & cheese sandwiches (white bread and american cheese of course). burritos. hamburgers. hotdogs.

i am not kidding - that is ALL he ate. of course, him and his family are blessed with good genes and they are all crazy tall, a healthy weight, and appear healthy. so because he looked fine, he didn't think there was anything wrong with his diet.

when we moved in together, a typical night would go like this: i would make a balanced meal for dinner. he would take one look, wrinkle his nose, and cook a burger on the grill. or eat a frozen pizza. because his schedule was so weird, he was only home 3 nights a week, so it wasn't a huge problem for me, although it was very annoying.

recently, he has been home every night and i have taken on the responsibility of making dinner. i was pretty lazy for awhile and we had a lot of pizza, which resulted in me gaining 20 pounds. i realized that i couldn't keep going like that and i needed to start eating healthy again. then we went on the 17 day diet, and although he hated it, jared was able to eat the vegetables. he kept commenting about how great he felt and how he wants to incorporate healthy eating into our lives. i was thrilled!

well, the strict part of the 17 day diet is over and j has completely reverted back to his old eating habits!! sausage and pepperoni pizza with ranch dressing. spaghetti with plain meat sauce. he has made a *few* changes - wheat bread, eating more yogurt, cut back on coffee - but the veggies have basically vanished from his diet.

last night we got into a fight because i made lasagna for dinner. i used ground turkey and whole wheat noodles, which he was ok with. but then i also chopped up some zucchini, mushrooms, and red peppers to put into the sauce. you would have thought i was trying to poison him by the reaction i got.

he can't understand why i would "ruin a perfectly good dish by adding vegetables", and i can't understand why he wouldn't want the veggies to be "hidden" in the meal, since they add more flavor and texture to the dish.

i can't get through to him that we need to add as many veggies to things as possible, in order to get more fiber and nutrients. I would rather have them in my main dishes instead of having to eat 5 bowls of salad a day.

it seems like if i want to compromise i have to either
a) let him make his own dinner - which he doesn't have time to do because of his school/work schedule and which will result in him having pizza or fast food every night
b) make him something different - which i just refuse to do on principal
c) make what he likes and try to eat more salad

none of these seem like a viable option to me. is it wrong to think that if you are the one making the meals for the family, then the other person should be happy you're cooking and eat what they're served? or do i just not understand what it's like to be a picky eater?

i'm so sick of this being a battle every night. it's making me feel like he's a child, which is NOT good for the marriage.

how does mealtime work in your house?

homemade sugar scrub

2011-02-04T11:14:00.001-07:00

anyone who knows me, knows that i love me some sugar scrub. now that i've been on a budget, it's been a little out of my price range. it's usually $20 for a smallish tub that i end up having to ration*.

so in the spirit of being more crafty, and also because i have sugar in my cabinet that i won't be *eating* due to my weight loss attempts, i looked up how to make it myself..

holy crap is it EASY!!!

here's the gist.

50% white sugar, 50% brown sugar. mix and place in container (i used a glass storage container that normally goes in the fridge).

pour some sort of oil until the sugar is almost saturated (i used olive oil).

add a bit of vanilla extract or any type of essential oil.

mix it up a bit.

voila.

my skin is SO soft. for approximately $3.

now i know what to make for my clients next christmas! if i can find cute packaging, i might try to sell on etsy.

*and yell at j if he decides to use it!

today was a good day

2011-02-02T16:21:00.000-07:00

i haven't had the opportunity to utter those words much over the last year or so. i feel like there's been this black cloud following me around a bit. but today, 3 little things happened to give me a little hope and make me realize that it will be sunny again someday.

1) this morning i finally broke my plateau and was down 1/2 pound. that equals 10.5 lbs since Jan 1. i was getting discouraged because jared was losing so much more, but 10 pounds in a month is still pretty good. if i can keep this up, i'll be at my goal weight in 3 months.

2) i found out that i made my sales quota for january - this is the first time since i started with the company that this has happened. january and february are notoriously slow and i am usually behind until about april. this will help us tremendously with our finances this month.

3) jared and i started the fertility testing process. i had my bloodwork taken this week and the doctor just called me and said that everything is normal. of course, there still could be other issues with me (scarring, etc), but getting one unknown out of the way is a relief. jared goes in for his tests on sunday, so we're crossing our fingers that he has lots of strong swimmers.

it's always nice to have some of the stress in our lives alleviated.

brand name fail

2011-02-01T12:22:00.001-07:00

i usually avoid going to establishments which imply that their customers are akin to livestock. the golden corral is one of them. the second is dressbarn.

next week i have my annual sales meeting in new orleans and i realized that i have no nice business casual clothes to wear. i work from home, so my usual outfit is jeans and a hoodie or a sweater. i have 2 pairs of dress pants and a few cardigans that i wear when i visit customers, but i don't have enough cute outfits for a whole week with my coworkers. i decided to do a little shopping, but i didn't want to invest heavily since i am determined to NOT be this size for much longer.

my first go-to spot was old navy and i did pretty well. i got some cardigans, a jersey wrap dress, and a pair of skinny jeans (which i never ever ever thought i would buy, but i need them for my cute new boots*). i didn't find a good blazer or anything business-y though. as i was leaving, i noticed that there was a dressbarn next door. since the weather was bad, there was virtually no one around and i decided that i could quickly check out the store, just to see if it was a bad as i thought it would be.

i ended up spending $136 there. i got a cute silk tank (pictured on the model) in a colbalt/black paisley-type pattern to wear under a black sweater with black pants. i got a clearance brown/green patterned gauzy tank ($7!) to wear under this blazer (although mine is a dark tan color, not black). i got this grey long sleeved tunic with a cute monochrome rosette detail at the collar. i also got a cowl neck scarf (brown/grey) and 3 pairs of earrings.

i was happy to shop in the "misses" section and not the "womens" section, although the "womens" section actually had some really cute things that weren't available in the smaller sizes. that kind of sucked.

anyhow, i was surprised. i'm not sure what i thought i would find in there, but i assumed it would be hideous, all based on the name. i'm guessing that when it started, their brand manager was like "i have a GREAT idea for a name! hint: it's where all the self proclaimed "clothes horses" will want to shop!"

*so annoyed that these are only $26 now. I paid around $40, which I thought was a good deal at the time!! i am also pissed because they are now sold out of black ones. they are very comfy.

the time i was sued

2011-01-24T09:19:00.002-07:00

as i mentioned in this post, the house we are living in now isn't one we picked by choice. this is something that is difficult to deal with emotionally, considering the people that used to live here.

once they were kicked out of this house by the city, i thought i would never have to deal with them again. 10 months later, as we were packing up our house to move and 3 weeks before our wedding, there was a knock at the door around 9pm. had i been home alone, i would have ignored it, but jared answered the door and just like that, we were served.

the summons said that we were being sued by the previous tenants in small claims court for $7500. which, not coincidentally i'm sure, is the maximum amount that you can sue for in small claims court. this meant that if i counter sued for even $1, the case would get kicked into district court and lawyers would probably need to be involved. they were suing me for 2 things.
They claimed:
*they did not receive their deposit back
*they were forced to move and lost all of their belongings due to a mold problem

right away, i knew they didn't have a leg to stand on because:
*they never paid me a deposit
*they were forced to move by the city - the mold problem was remediated.

the court date was scheduled for a day that we were on our honeymoon. i kicked into high gear and got the court date changed and scheduled a meeting with an attorney. he mentioned to us that we were going through 3 of the 5 major stressors that can happen to people, all at once. getting married, selling a house/moving, and getting sued. great.
he gave me some good advice, but also left me with this statement.
if you plan to be a landlord for awhile, this won't be the first time you're sued.

like the nerd i am, i spent weeks googling what to expect in court and what to do and not to do. i gathered all documents and pictures i could find, made copies, and organized them in a binder. i prepared my opening speech and practiced it in front of jared. jared actually made fun of me, but i told him that we shouldn't underestimate these people. he was convinced that they would be completely unprepared, but i had a suspicion that this wasn't the first time they were involved in a lawsuit.

they day of the court date, we arrived 30 minutes early, prepared and dressed nicely. 30 minutes passed and the plaintiff still wasn't there. we held our breath, thinking maybe they wouldn't show up. the court told us that they would give them an extra 15 minutes. we were livid. if you can't show up on time to court, you shouldn't get extra time. sure enough, 10 minutes later, we see the door open, followed by a baby carrier and the plaintiff*.

before we could go in front of the judge, we were required to go through mediation. we met with mediators who told us that there was a $100 fee for the mediation. the plaintiff refused to pay it. the mediators tried to negotiate with her for about 20 minutes before they finally gave up and waived the fee.

after going over the details of the case, jared and i were a little worried about three things.
*even though she didn't pay a deposit to me, she paid one to the previous landlord that never transferred to me. i didn't know if that was my responsibility to have it transferred or not. if it was, i may be liable for 3x the deposit amount because even though they did not deserve to receive their deposit back, there was no letter sent to them itimizing the damages.
*we didn't know how the judge would react to the mold situation. even though i thought i did everything the right way (working with the insurance and a contractor to take care of the problem asap), maybe i was wrong?
*we didn't know if the judge will feel sorry for the plaintiff since she is clearly poor, has a lot of kids, and is not educated. versus us, who appear to be the opposite. i had never been in court before, so i didn't know if there was ever a bias in these type of situations.

things got pretty heated in the mediation and the mediators, even though they aren't allowed to give us legal advice, were strongly encouraging us to settle because of the mold issue. jared and i decided to offer them $1600, which was the amount of the deposit. they didn't accept it and wanted us to pay them $4500. we countered with $2000. they declined and we went in front of the judge.

the judge asked if we had any witnesses and the plaintiff named her daughter. i wasn't going to have a witness, but i decided to name jared. what i didn't know is that they would send the witnesses out of the room during most of the trial. so there i am, alone, scared and nervous at the defendant platform. we start the trial and i have to listen to the plaintiffs sob story for a good 45 minutes while i am not allowed to say anything. finally it's my turn to talk. i say my part about not being paid a deposit and show the judge the signed lease i had with "0" clearly written in the deposit line. the judge asks the plaintiff why she's not suing the previous landlord instead and immediately clears me of that charge.

right then i think, oh wow. maybe this WILL be cut and dry like it should be. i relaxed a bit and we got onto the mold issue. of course, i had all the documentation about how it was being remediated and the plaintiff had the option to move but they didn't want to. i also had the piece of evidence that i'm pretty sure the plaintiff wouldn't want me to show. i had the actual eviction notice from the city that said they were living in squalor and went into details about how they were feeding their dogs from the trash and there was a dead animal on the front porch, etc.

there were a few more details and we went back and forth and then the witnesses were called in and we went back and forth some more. finally the judge said that i had acted appropriately and done everything i could and none of it was my fault. she dismissed the case.

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

that was one of the biggest rushes of my life.

it restored my faith in the judicial system.

and i was thrilled that our greedy tenant could have had $2000, but ended up with NOTHING. i would have liked to have sued them for the money it cost me to deal with this ($50 to the courts, $250 to the attorney, $12 for parking!), but there's no way i would have seen a dime from them even if i won the case. not worth it.

it also made me hyper aware of the risks of being a landlord. i am way more diligent about doing everything by the book, getting everything in writing, and covering all of my bases.

because i really don't want to have to go through that again. it was one of the most stressful times in my life. i couldn't even FULLY enjoy my honeymoon because the court date was looming over my head for when i returned.

i have faith that karma will catch up to these people. they've worked the system and other people for way too long. quite honesty, their lifestyle is probably punishment enough.

*there was not a time that i had ever NOT seen this lady pregnant. before they were kicked out, they had a baby and we didn't even know she was pregnant until after the baby was born. sure enough, she was pregnant again, bringing the grand total to 10 children and another one on the way. this is revolting to me on so many levels.

day 16 and be careful what you wish for

2011-01-16T09:35:00.001-07:00

today is day 16 of phase 1 of the 17 day diet. i am so happy that we've stuck with it this long! i've been stalled at a 7lb loss for about a week, which is frustrating, but 7 lbs is still really good! it's doing a number on our social life though. we ran into some friends at the daniel tosh* show last night and felt like losers because we didn't want to go out with them after the show. going to a bar when you can't drink or eat anything is so hard that it's not even worth it. i'm not sure our friends understand.

we have 2 more days of this detox phase and then we can start adding in red meat, pork, shellfish, starchy veg, and some whole grains. i can't wait to have a steak and baked potato. i'm hoping that this will break my plateau. during this phase, we can also start working out more. i absolutely HATE HATE HATE running, but i have this sneaking suspicion that it might be the only exercise that will really work for me.. since i've tried everything else. i heard about this program called couch to 5 k, which is an app and helps you with the interval training. you start with running at 90 second intervals (which honestly, i'm not sure i can even do yet) alternating with 120 second walking intervals and then go from there. i think you can even put in customized music, but i'm not sure if that is a feature on the blackberry app version. i'm researching it today.

remember the other day when i was complaining that jared hadn't found a job yet? well, after 1 week of seriously looking, he found one! it's only $10/hr and he's driving a forklift all day, but it works with his schedule and he's qualified to do it. when he went in to fill out the application, it was obvious that although there were a lot of people applying, the competition wasn't that stiff. he has a professional demeanor and appearance, and so when he stuck around to talk to the owner about the position (for 45 minutes), i knew that he would get the job. sure enough, the guy called him the next day and he starts tomorrow.

i am a little sad because he will be working from 7am-3:30pm M-F and then he has to leave for class at 5:30 and gets home around 10. that is a LONG day. but he is willing to do it, which makes me happy. he's always been a hard worker when procrastination is not an option. i think it will give him some much needed time management skills. and i've been wanting to cancel our cable for awhile (it's just not worth $75/month to me - especially with netflix and hulu - there are so many other things i need to do besides zoning out to some stupid show).

it's really going to suck not seeing him though. i know we were spending too much time together, but this just seems like the other extreme! it's only temporary though, so i know we'll get through it.

*how can someone be so insulting and so HOT at the same time? mmmm.. i heart him!

an analogy

2011-01-15T12:15:00.004-07:00

for me and jared, trying to have a baby is a lot like trying to sell a house.

selling a house
when you first put your house on the market, you think you're going to sell it right away. it's for sale, you have showings, OF COURSE it will sell.
trying to conceive
when you decide to have a baby, you think you'll get pregnant right away. you're having unprotected sex, OF COURSE you'll get pregnant.
selling a house
the first month goes by and you've had several showings each week, but no offfers. that's ok, sometimes it takes a little while.
trying to conceive
the first month goes by and you've had sex several times each week, but no baby. that's ok, sometimes it takes a little while.
selling a house
three months go by and you don't have an offer. even though you have showings and those showings are perfect. you clean really well and stage the house perfectly. you burn scented candles. you leave a bowl of candy out for your potential buyers. you leave soothing classical music playing during the showing. you start to get a little worried.
trying to conceive
three months go by and you aren't pregnant. even though you have sex when you're ovulating. you abstain from alcohol and take prenatal vitamins and your husband wears loose boxers. you start to get a little worried.
selling a house
five months go by and you start researching "how long is an average house on the market". you read a lot of things that calm you and terrify you at the same time. you realize that some people sell the first week of being on the market, and for others it takes years. you keep doing what you think is right, but you become obsessed. it's all you and your husband talk about.
trying to conceive
five months go by and you start researching "how long does it take the average couple to get pregnant". you read a lot of things that calm you and terrify you at the same time. you realize that some people will get pregnant the first week of trying, and for others it takes years. you keep doing what you think is right, but you become obsessed. it's all you and your husband talk about.
selling a house
several more months go by and you start wondering what else you can do. you try not to get your hopes up for each showing but are still disappointed when you don't get an offer. you start getting irritated at well-meaning friends and family that keep telling you to "give it time, it will happen". then, OMG, you FINALLY get an offer and you're over the moon happy and you feel like all is right in the world. and it falls through.
trying to conceive
several more months go by and you start wondering what else you can do. you try not to get your hopes up every month but are still disappointed when you get your period. you start getting irritated at well-meaning friends and family that keep telling you to "give it time, it will happen". then, OMG, you FINALLY skip a period and you're over the moon happy and you feel like all is right in the world. and then it arrives a week late.
selling a house
more months go by and you start to get depressed. you wonder how you'll be able to live the life you dreamed of if you never sell the house. you are stressed about it and cannot relax, no matter how many well-intentioned people tell you to. you are annoyed with people who had no problem selling their house. you are especially annoyed with people who didn't even want to sell their house, yet someone offered to buy it. you wonder if you waited too long to sell you house and it will be impossible in this market. you go to your realtor and say "what is wrong with my house? is it fixable? is it unsellable?" you buy a statue of st. joseph and plant it in your yard and say a prayer because you figure it can't hurt.
trying to conceive
more months go by and you start to get depressed. you wonder how you'll be able to live the life you dreamed of if you never have children. you are stressed about it and cannot relax, no matter how many well-intentioned people tell you to. you are annoyed with people who had no problem getting pregnant. you are especially annoyed with people who didn't even want to become pregnant, and got knocked up accidentally. you wonder if you waited too long to try to have a baby and if it will be impossible because you are too old. you go to your doctor and say "what is wrong with us? is it fixable? are we infertile?" you buy a thermometer and chart your basal body temperature because you figure it can't hurt.
selling a house
just when you've resigned yourself to the fact that maybe you weren't meant to sell your house right now and you start to think that you can stay in that house for a little while longer, you get a frantic call from your realtor who tells you that the most perfect first time homebuyers LOVE LOVE LOVE your house and they are heading back to the office RIGHT NOW to make an offer. you close and move out and well after the fact you think to yourself "i can't believe i was so worried.. of COURSE we would sell the house! i can't believe we were so impatient.. these things take time."
trying to conceive
and this is where i can't continue the analogy.. because we are still not pregnant. but this is what i really hope will finally happen to us - and when we look back on everything, we'll wish we hadn't stressed ourselves out so much because these things totally take time. we still have 4 more months before we hit the year mark and will be considered for having fertility problems. i'm hoping we don't make it to that point.. but if we do we'll figure it out then.

crafty goodness

2011-01-14T15:34:00.001-07:00

i found out about this through lori's blog. here's how it works:
the first 5 people who leave a comment will get a homemade goodie from me. in turn, they must commit to doing the same thing on their blog. have fun!

the vortex

2011-01-14T10:47:00.000-07:00

here's the picture i promised.

right now we are using it for storage. when we finally get the money, it will be a beautiful 1000 sq ft with a master suite (including 5 piece bath and walk in closet), study, and tv room. i'm hoping this happens within the next 2 years.

heating the vortex

2011-01-11T22:25:00.022-07:00

our electric/gas bill came in the mail today. it was $171.18. i am trying to figure out how it is so high, considering that we keep the house between 60-65 degrees and it has been a relatively warm winter. right now i am in fleece pj pants, a long sleeve t, slippers, and a heavy duty fleece robe and i am still freezing.

i know it's because we are heating 2000 sq feet of house. but since we're really only living in 1000 sq feet of house, it doesn't feel like our bill should be twice what i'm used to.

lost yet?

i haven't mentioned this house to the extent of it's importance in our lives, because it is the bane of my existence. besides the wedding, it was my main topic of conversation in 2010 and i'm a little OVER it, but i will try my best to get you caught up on the story.

the house we are currently living in is a house i bought for the sole purpose of renting it and then eventually selling it. it was purchased approximately 2 months before the housing market crashed. luckily it was rented out to section 8 tenants, which meant that my mortgage was paid by the government each month. things were great for a little while and then the ~~asshole~~ guy that was managing the property for me went crazy and decided that he didn't have to pay the mortgage anymore and we should all buy gold and move to the mountains and live off the grid. so my mortgage wasn't getting paid and i decided that i had to take over the management of the properties (yes, i had two with him - one is currently rented to college kids) and became a landlord overnight. fun.

so i became a landlord and i thought i should get to know my tenants. they. were. AWFUL. 11 people living in this house like pigs. breaking everything. crap overflowing out of the house. way too many chihuahuas. flies. *shudder*

we had to come over every month to pick up their portion of the rent ($126 - the city payed $1474) and hated it. these people were the definition of "taking advantage of the system". the husband worked under the table, the mom was pregnant 24/7, and they were on welfare. besides continually having children to get more money, they had: cell phones, internet, cable, elitches (6 flags) season passes for ALL of their kids, and there were always empty papa johns pizza boxes piled high on the front porch. j and i both have jobs and even WE don't regularly splurge on the expensive take out pizza.

one time when we were over there fixing something, one of their kids was bugging us and hanging on the towel bar in the bathroom, which of course broke. i looked at him incredulously and said "stop it! you just broke the towel bar!" to which he nonchalantly replied, "oh that's ok, someone will fix it". to which i replied, "yeah! that someone is ME!".

these people always had run ins with the neighbors and cops and i knew they were bad tenants and i didn't like being a slumlord, but if we kicked them out, we would have to find a bunch of money we didn't have to fix up the place before we could get new renters in. so we just let it be and buried our heads in the sand.

over the next year, we had to deal with a mold problem in the basement which involved insurance companies and unsavory contractors. a normal tenant might be a little concerned and ask to break their lease due to the mold, which i would, of course, allowed. but seeing as though these people had been kicked out of 10 houses over the last 10 years, they didn't want to leave.

in july of 2009, i received a phone call from the tenant, crying about how the city was making her move. the next day, i received a call from the city telling me that they were evicting my tenants for......drum roll please...

living in squalor (!)

yes, that is actually what was written on the eviction notice.

they moved out, we freaked out about having an vacant house and two mortgage payments, and had a few months of not knowing what to do. we finally came up with the plan to put our current house on the market (the one i bought in 2005 that i loved dearly but really was too small) and then use any money we made on that house to fix up the vacant rental and live in it. because it was bigger and would be a more appropriate house for when we started a family.

we put our house on the market in oct 2009 and after 80+ showings, finally sold it in may 2010. we also made $24k, which doesn't go as far as you think when you're having to completely gut a 2000 sq ft house. in fact, it really only gets you about 80% of 1000 sq ft.

then we made really smart decisions, like letting jared quit his (high paying) job to go back to school and were reduced to a single income family.

it wouldn't be so bad if the basement was just old and needed updating. but due to the mold problems, the entire basement was removed. all the floor. all the drywall. all the fixtures. everything. then a french drain was installed to control the water-table problem. and a bunch of gravel was shoveled in. and all the windows were replaced (since we did all the upstairs ones too). and then, with $8k still sitting in escrow with the mortgage company, everything was halted because we ran out of money and we don't have the $5k required to pour the new basement floor and install the rough in plumbing.

i call it the vortex. i will take a picture soon and post it.

right now the upstairs of the house is livable. it's not pretty or finished, but we have working appliances and essential things like doors*. here is a partial list of the things we still have to do, just so you can get the picture.

trim the office closet and install closet doors
mud the inside of the hall closet and install shelf and bar
install crown molding (moulding?) over the kitchen cabinets
cover 2x4's in kitchen
paint kitchen ceiling and window trim
install doorknob and trim around pantry door
fill all nail holes and paint trim/baseboard
caulk around bathroom sink
finish installing baseboard in kitchen and office
install kickplates under kitchen cabinets
fix broken tile in kitchen and regrout floor

that's just a partial list. so you can see why i get annoyed when jared is watching judge mathis in the middle of the day instead of doing one of the things on his list that is clearly more important to the family.

a year after the house was vacant, you'd think that we would never have to deal with those tenants again. that's what i thought too. until i was served** and notified that they were suing me in small claims court for $7500. more on that story later.

*we did not have interior doors for about 6 weeks. no bathroom door does not a happy marriage make.
**one month before our wedding, because apparently i didn't have enough going on and had plenty of time to hire attorneys and reschedule court dates and file replies and all other sorts of legal-y stuff.

math nerd

2011-01-11T08:08:00.000-07:00

i got a little too excited yesterday when i realized that if i'm able to get pregnant this month, there is a decent chance that our baby will be born on 09/10/11.

back to class!

2011-01-10T11:36:00.000-07:00

tonight is j's first night back in class after the christmas break. i'm excited and guilty about being excited at the same time.

it's not that i like him being gone every evening, i just really like having my alone time, which i have been getting less and less of since j quit his job. now that we're both home all day (and all night when he doesn't have class), it's a little much. i think some apart time is good for the marriage. i need a chance to miss him.

right now he's at a job interview. finally. this is a little sore spot for me as well because he quit his job in september, was supposed to take ONE month off and then start looking for something part time while he was in school. that one month turned into four months. FOUR MONTHS of one income = super stressful. as most of you know, i do not handle having an unemployed partner well - mostly because my ex was on and off of work for years. it scares me. j isn't lazy or entitled like my ex, but it still worries me that this will become a pattern.

j is a hard worker, but he is also a procrastinator. which means that i have to ~~nag~~ encourage him to search for a job. which only makes me irritated, especially when i'm also ~~nagging~~ encouraging him to finish up the projects around the house.

i just hate feeling like i have to do everything - make the money, pay the bills, manage the household, plan our social life.. and be the taskmaster for everything. it gets tiring. i know that he will help me if i ask him to, but sometimes that creates even more work because i have to figure out what i can have him do and then ask him to do it. it is so much nicer when he realizes something needs to be done and just does it.* and no women ever wants to feel like she's an ~~encourager~~ nag.

i know this isn't something unique to our marriage. how do the rest of you balance the work load?

*like when he makes the bed, does the dishes, cleans the litter box, takes out the trash, all of which he is getting good at doing without asking, but there was still a time when i HAD to ask...

17 days is a long time/nostalgia

2011-01-09T16:37:00.000-07:00

j and i have been very successful in the 17 day diet thus far. i've lost 7 pounds and j has lost 12 pounds. we haven't cheated either, which is an amazing feat in itself. we are on day 9 and feel like this first phase will never end. it's not that we're hungry, it's that we're BORED. we can't use food as entertainment like we used to do and that makes me a little cranky. of course, using food for entertainment is probably why we're on this diet in the first place, which makes me crankier.

however, this is the easiest diet that i have ever been on and i believe it's solely because j is doing it with me. amazing how much that makes a difference.

when i first started blogging, SIX years ago, it was kind of the new trend. i followed a lot of other blogs that were just starting out and i enjoyed "connecting" with so many strangers who seemed to be paralleling my life. then i got my new job where i worked from home (and didn't have to pretend to work all day) and facebook became the new trend and i stopped blogging regularly and reading others blogs.

for some reason this weekend, i decided to catch up with some of my old favorites. and by "catch up", i mean, "read the past 4 years of archives in chronological order on She Just Walks Around With It." right now i'm in the middle of 2006 and it's weird how reading through these posts is causing me to remember where i was in my life when i read them the first time. i have always felt a weird connection to the author of that blog, kristy. we seemed to be going through the same things at the same time and have a similar way of expressing ourselves. we were both single girls living in a city, trying to lose weight, drinking wine, going on crazy dates. and then we got married and our lives changed and now she has a baby and one on the way and that's what i'm working towards as well. and it just kind of hit me how crazy it is that SO much can happen in such a relatively short time and where does that time go? and although i am so happy with my life, i got very nostalgic about that time when i was single and just..waiting for the rest of my life to happen.

i really feel like these last 2 years have gone by in an absolute blur. and i've had some major changes, but i feel like i'm stuck in some sort of weird limbo that i won't get out of anytime soon. like there are still a few things i need to do before my "new life" really starts.. and right now i'm stuck between the past and the future and not really able to enjoy being in the present. and i know that when i read this 3 years from now and all of the things i'm currently obsessed with have finally happened, i'll wonder why i didn't allow myself to just enjoy this in-between time and LIVE MY LIFE.

so that's what i'm going to try to do in 2011. live in the present and not worry so much about the future, because when the future finally happens, i'll wish that i had taken advantage of my life as it is right now.

Day 6

2011-01-06T12:43:00.000-07:00

5.5 days down, 11.5 days to go. we're still going stong. j made homemade tomato sauce last night which was delicious. i managed to get through my 2 days of client lunches and kept on track as best as i could. the side veggies with my salmon were sauteed and included zucchini which i can't have yet. and i did have one sip of my green tea before i realized it was sweetened. it wasn't as hard as i thought to watch my clients eat fries and sandwiches, although they sure looked good.

j has lost 11 pounds so far and i'm down 5.5. that's keeping us motivated for sure. we are getting a little bored, especially with the veggies, but i'm experimenting a little more with spices.

we are both very excited for phase two - where we can add in shellfish, beef and pork, starchy veggies, all fruits, and some whole grains. should make things a little more interesting!

Day 3

2011-01-03T18:27:00.000-07:00

i was expecting to be drooling over real food today like i have been for the past few days. but it really wasn't that bad! i was babysitting my nieces and managed to take them to starbucks for a vanilla steamer (green tea for me) and watch them eat their sandwiches without wanting to shoot myself.

i was also down FOUR pounds today, so that helps.

one thing that i'm battling with is how to keep ground turkey, chicken, fish, and veggies exciting.. because that's pretty much all i can eat for the next 42 meals. i've already done stir fry and salad.. if anyone has any recipes using these ingredients along with eggs, spices and/or a little olive oil, i would LOVE to have them!

i'm a little nervous because i have a co-worker in town tomorrow and wednesday and of course we have to take clients out to lunch and dinner. this is when being on a diet is SO HARD. so much of my job is tied to wining and dining. i'm planning to just order a salad with a grilled chicken breast and some oil/vinegar. which will be torturous because i'm sure there will be a bread basket right in front of me or someone will be evil and order french fries.

jared is threatening to tag along because he doesn't trust me - but i will show him!

17 days

2011-01-02T15:33:00.000-07:00

yesterday j and i started the 17 day diet. dr. phil and the doctors have been heavily promoting it and since j watches both of those shows daily, he suggested we try it.

both of us have gained 30-40 pounds since the wedding and it was starting to get out of control. and since we're trying to start a family, we figured that losing some weight might make it easier. starting a diet on january 1 is nothing new to me, but j has never been on a diet before. this is the first time that i have been on a diet with a significant other, so maybe it will be easier?

we've been joking about it since we decided to try it. and last week we ate like food was going out of style. i was convinced that j would back out at the last minute, especially since all he probably needs to do to lose weight is scale back his portions a bit. but he didn't, and now we're on day two.

right now we're in the 1st phase, which lasts 17 days. it's a detoxifying phase - we all know how fun those are. we can eat: eggs, unlimited chicken/turkey/fish, unlimited veggies, 2 low sugar fruits, green tea, black coffee, and 2 probiotic yogurts a day.

yesterday was tough. we were both cranky from sugar withdrawal and hungry. j is not the biggest fan of veggies or fish, but he's being a trooper. j couldn't get over the fact that he ate huge plate of salmon and veggies, yet didn't feel full and satisfied. welcome to dieting, baby.

today was a little better, although i had to go to costco to get some greek yogurt and chicken breasts and it was so hard to pass up all of the samples. once the withdrawal symptoms go away, i'm sure it will be much easier.

both of us feel better already - i have more energy and we each lost a few pounds this morning.

i'm hoping that by having j's support on this, and being able to cook for both of us and not have to sit there starving while he devours a huge plate of spaghetti, it will work and i can finally get down to a normal weight.

wish us luck!

honeymoon part one

2010-12-23T17:31:00.000-07:00

there have been a lot of things i've wanted to blog about over the past few weeks, but i am paranoid that the people i would be blogging about would somehow stumble across this and make things messier than they already are. so i'm going to refrain from it until i can think of some way to make the issues more vague.

there are also several personal struggles that i am going though right now, but i'm not sure how to blog about them appropriately. i'm sure they'll come out in time.

so in the interest of avoiding another 12 month span between blog posts, i will tell you the story of how i thought i ruined our honeymoon.

when we started planning the honeymoon, i had a very specific idea in my head of what i wanted it to be, as i'm sure most brides do. i knew i wanted to go somewhere exotic and unusual. no hawaii or mexico for me -um.. WAY too common. this is what i wanted:

so i started researching the greek isles (and telling everyone that's where we were planning to go) and i bargained with myself that if we stayed in a more budget hotel and not the $500 per night private villas it wouldn't really matter because HELLO! we were in the GREEK ISLES! then that stupid volcano in iceland erupted and we decided that maybe going near europe wasn't such a good idea.

so my next choice was something like this:

it turns out that a private tahitian hut in the ocean with a glass bottomed hot tub is so far out of our price range that it would have cost more than our actual wedding. so that idea was scratched.

then i thought that perhaps something in the caribbean would be better suited to our price range and schedule. it was too overwhelming to pick the best island to visit, so i called a travel agent who specialized in honeymoons. i told her that we wanted to go to the caribbean but under no circumstances did i want to stay in a cheesy sandals resort in jamaica. that's when she suggested barbados.

i started looking at hotels in barbados and found some amazing hotels (including the one where tiger woods was married). i picked out 3 hotels that seemed pretty luxurious, but not too outrageous, and sat down with j to make a decision. j pointed out that since we were on a very fixed budget, we could afford these hotels, but we couldn't afford much else besides food.. and wouldn't we want to do a bunch of activities while we were there? we hopped onto expedia to see what the price range of hotels was in barbados and HOLY CRAP HERE'S ONE THAT IS $2000 CHEAPER THAN WHAT WE PICKED OUT!!!!!!

i didn't book it right away, because i am very ~~anal~~ prudent about getting past the marketing bull and finding out what a place is really like, so i had to spend 2 days googling and reading all 500 reviews on every single travel review website that i could find. overall, the coconut court beach hotel got very favorable reviews from fellow travelers. the gist of the reviews were that yes, the hotel was old and a little outdated (no 1000 thread count sheets here!), but the staff was superb, the location was outstanding, and the beach was the most perfect spot of beach on the whole island.

we decided to book. because REALLY, how much time will we *actually* spend in the room, even thought it *is* our honeymoon? the beach and location are WAY more important, right? and $2000 is a lot of island tours and yummy meals and alcohol and snorkeling trips and shopping, right??

we are practical people.

so we booked the resort, sent in the deposit, and looked forward to our first major vacation together and jared's first time out of the country.

to be continued...

infestation

2010-12-14T18:01:00.000-07:00

our house is being attacked by fruit flies. they are mostly in the kitchen, but aren't afraid of exploring the bathroom and living room.

it is SO annoying. and quite embarrassing. i know i don't clean my house as often as i should, but we are not dirty people, so i really can't understand why we can't get rid of these little buggers.

a few days ago, i put all of our fruit in the fridge and wiped down the counters really well. then i poured baking soda down the drain, followed with vinegar to let it fizz and clean all the nooks and crannies of the garbage disposal. and then i poured a whole kettle of boiling water down the drain.

i have 3 apple cider/saran wrap traps set out to catch them.

we take the trash out every day and have a closed trash can.

it feels like nothing is working! any ideas of other places they could be breeding?

giving back

2010-12-09T10:23:00.000-07:00

around the holidays i start to get the bug to do some volunteer work. i wish that i was a better person and it was a year round thing that i could commit too, but i'm not quite there yet.
i used to volunteer a lot. in highschool i was active in all the community service clubs and regularly worked at soup kitchens and did canned food drives and rang bells for the salvation army. i also headed up the ecology club and we did cleanups and recycling drives. then in college, my sorority did work with alzheimers patients and habitat for humanity among other things.
once i was on my own, it was difficult to find these opportunities. and i had a lot less time.
but i really started to miss the feeling of giving back. sending a check to feed a homeless family for thanksgiving every year just didn't really cut it for me. i'm the type of person that would rather give my time than my money. i've found that this is fairly difficult to do.
last year i was searching for volunteer opportunities in denver and was discouraged with all the hoops i had to jump though - applications and references? commit to a minimum of 10 hours per week? where were the "i have some free time this saturday and can help you out - what do you need?" events?
i understand the reasoning behind the background checks and minimum hours, i really do. i just wonder how many people they are turning away who want to help.
this year, i found this fantastic site - volunteer match. so far, I have wrapped presents and helped with a few adoption events at the lifeline puppy rescue. this weekend j and i will be putting together food baskets for seniors and then helping again at the puppy rescue.
it's nice to have something rewarding to do with my time, and lord knows we could use the karma right now.

inspiration

2010-12-08T11:47:00.000-07:00

inspiration always strikes me at the most random times. usually i'm in the middle of something else and i have to stop what i'm doing so that i can do the new thing right. this. minute. for example, i'll be blow drying my hair when i decide to make a new recipe for dinner. so i stop blow drying to go take stock of the ingredients i have and make a shopping list. with wet hair. i have no idea why i can't finish the first thing i'm doing and THEN start the new thing. i can either look at it as a super annoying habit, or multi-tasking at it's finest.. i think it's really just adult ADD.

so anyhow, i recently started reading a blog done by lori, a friend of mine from highschool - it's called no more sweatpants. it's a fashion blog that details her journey to be more creative with the clothes in her closet and to test her fashion boundaries. i've spent most of my morning reading her archives and i am totally inspired to do something similar. since i started working from home, i have become very lax in my outfits. when i started gaining more weight, i slipped even further. i'm typing this at 11:30 on a wednesday morning and i am still in my pajamas and fuzzy bathrobe. in a few minutes i will most likely change into either workout clothes or jeans and a hoodie to run my errands. if i meet a client i will wear the only pair of dress pants that fits me and a neutral colored cardigan. it's BORING. and i feel FRUMPY. which makes me feel worse about myself. not cool.

i would love to get dressed up a little, but i'm terrified that i will look ridiculous because or how large i am right now. but that is TOTALLY stupid. i'm going to look the same size in jeans and a hoodie as i would look in nicer jeans, a sweater, cute shoes, and some accessories. yeah i'll look big, but i'll also look put together. this will make me feel better about myself which will help lead to better food and exercise choices which will lead to a smaller body and more confident me.

the other thing that inspires me about lori's blog is that most of her clothes are thrifted or from the places that i like to shop (ross, target, kohls, etc). they're not expensive, yet she makes them look fantastic! i've always been frugal, but a little wary of thrift stores. lately i've been wanting to give them a go - make it more of a treasure hunt - and satisfy my shopping desire without spending money i don't have.

so today, after i put on my jeans and sweater with cute shoes and some accessories, i'm going to drop by the local thrift store to see if i can find something unique to jazz me up a little.

i'll let you know what i find.

what's the spin?

2010-12-08T09:47:00.001-07:00

i used to belong to this really cool gym, qi. it was an old warehouse converted into a gym and was downtown not too far from my old house. it had a really nice yoga room, state of the art cardio equipment, and a spin room with a huge garage door that they could open in the summer. there was local art all over the walls and i just loved the atmosphere. of course, it came with a $100 per month price tag.

my friend deb was a member and i went to the spin-yoga class with her. it was a half hour of spin and then a half hour of vinyasa yoga. it was the only exercise class that i actually enjoyed, mostly because the music in the spin class was perfectly matched with the changes in the routine and i could really lose myself. the routines were challenging and different every time, with a bit of yoga and strength training incorporated. the instructors were really good at telling you what was going on and what form you should be using.

i went to this class for a few months, but when j and i started adjusting our budget, the membership was something that had to go, especially since i already had a lifelong membership to 24 hour fitness that was paid for years ago.

last night i decided to try out the spin class offered by 24 hour fitness and was highly dissapointed.

the instructor, while a perfectly nice lady, is a little older and i'm not sure she quite understands how a spin class should work.

when i think of a spin class, i think of upbeat songs that most people know, that have super energetic bursts and then slow down a bit, so that you can match the intervals of the spin intensity. this can be about any dance-y song that is currently on the radio. i don't think my instructor understands this. the intervals she has us do don't match up with the songs at ALL. then after every song (or sometimes in the middle of them), she has to get off the bike and fiddle with her ipod because i don't think she has any idea on how to create a playlist! this makes for a really choppy class that goes by pretty slowly because you can never get fully into it.

now lets talk about the routine itself. while i appreciate the encouraging "woooooo!" that she gives us every 2 minutes, i wish she would be as vocal with the actual instructions on what we were supposed to do.

in the qi class, the instructions would be something along the lines of this: "turn it up to level 7 and hover - backs straights, arms bent, hand spread on the bars. ok, now turn it up to an 8 and climb up that hill - stand up.. now we're going to do some jumps in 4 second intervals - turn it to a 6 and UP-1-2-3-4, DOWN-1-2-3-4, UP-1-2-3-4..." the instructors were always talking and letting you know exactly what you should be doing.

in the 24 hour class, the instructions are more like this: "woooooooooo! ok let's start climbing. silence for 30 seconds. ok now you're going down hill. feel the wind in your hair! woooooooooo! ok now pedal fast." i have no idea what level i should be at and it gets pretty boring - all we do is sprinting intervals and standing climbs. for an HOUR.

my friend erin says the key to sticking with the gym is finding classes and instructors you like and then you'll want to go to the classes. unfortunately, this is the only spin class near my house.

i feel like i could teach it better.

omg i suck

2010-12-06T09:21:00.002-07:00

it's been a YEAR since my last post? sorry... this year has been so full of changes and revelations and stress that i think the thought of writing about it (after discussing it with pretty much anyone who would listen) just seemed overwhelming. but now i realize that instead of talking to *some* people about things, i really should just be writing them down so that i can get it out without subjecting people to listening to my issues. at least i know that you can just skim the post or skip it if you're not interested!

so.. what has been going on that is so overwhelming, you ask? where do i begin..? wedding. houses. jobs. family drama. friend drama. money. self esteem.

wedding.

j and i were married on 5/14/10! the wedding overall was good (at least people told me they had a good time), although of course it didn't go quite the way i planned. i'm sure i'll go into more details later - but here's a quick summary. it snowed and had to be moved inside. some people created a lot of drama over silly things and it stressed me out. there were family issues (apparently not attending my wedding is a way to get back at my mom for something she didn't even do). i didn't feel comfortable in my dress. BUT, when it was all said and done, i married the love of my life and that's all that matters.

houses.

at this time last year, we had 3 houses and one of them was vacant. the vacant one was also trashed and there was no way we could rent it out in it's current condition. our only solution was to sell the house we were living in. my first house. the house i loved and still have a strong attachment to. we put it on the market in october and after 7 months, 80+ showings, and an offer that fell through, we finally found a buyer. the day after we returned from our honeymoon (barbados!), we closed and the cutest couple ever took possession of our house. i was so happy that they were my buyers because they are exactly the type of people i wanted living in my house. we then moved into the quitman house, which is the one we rent to college kids (it was vacant for the summer) and started fixing up the fenton house (the one that was trashed). lost yet? it was insane. we lived in 3 houses within a 3 month time span. i don't recommend it.

so... long story short, we spent all the money we made on the house we sold to put in new windows, appliances, floors, doors, trim, fixtures, etc into the fenton house. which is now our home. which i am trying to make the best of even though i would never ever have chosen to live in this house. it is such a big stress of our lives and one that virtually none of our friends can understand. right now everything in the house is functional, but not finished. and it drives me BATTY!

jobs.

my job is actually going fantastically. after not making my goal last year and losing out on a bunch of $$, i am ahead of my goal this year. which is extremely helpful because j quit his job in september to go back to school. it a decision that both of us are on board with and one that had to be made. he's getting his BS in construction management, so i know that it will be very beneficial to our future. it's just another financial stressor that we have to deal with in order to set us up for success. being the main breadwinner though... that's a lot of pressure.

drama.

i don't really want to get into the friend or family drama on this blog because i don't want to add fuel to the fire should these people read this. let's just say that i am focusing on surrounding myself with individuals that act as positive forces in my life and am disassociating with those who i think are bringing negative energy into my life.

money.

one income. too much debt. 2 mortgages. it all piles up and we're having to make some serious choices. we are cutting back the extras like crazy and it's really hard on my ego to have to admit that even though i make decent money and have an engineering degree and my MBA, i still am not on par financially with my peers due to choices i made, some which were beyond my control. hopefully my frugal forays will be entertaining and useful to you all when i blog about them later.

and lastly...self esteem.

i have always struggled with my weight.. but even though i've always been a little chubby, i've been comfortable enough in my skin to not let it be too much of an issue. that has changed. i have gained so much weight since the wedding that not only do my clothes not fit, but i don't even recognize myself anymore in pictures. it's bad. i don't feel like i went crazy with the fast food or anything (because that's really not my style).. it's just the little things that ad up. having to eat out because we don't have a kitchen in the house we're fixing up. not exercising because i have to tile a floor. being stressed in general. the past 2 months we've been eating really healthy and i've been getting back into an exercise routine, but the scale hasn't budged. it hasn't gone *up* anymore, which is a good thing, but it hasn't gone down either. my normal habits at the gym just won't cut it anymore. the motivation is *almost* there and this will be something that i will try to blog about more so it keeps me accountable.

so there you go. my 2010 summary.

my goal for the rest of 2010 is to post at LEAST every other day in december so that i can get back into blogging. it's good for me.

miscommunication

2009-12-23T09:22:00.002-07:00

one thing that has been bugging me lately is the plethora of communication choices. between calling and texting and emailing and facebooking and twittering.. trying to figure out who prefers what is exhausting!

i personally prefer texting and emailing. i hate phone calls, unless there is a lot of specific information that is too complicated to text or email. a lot of times i can't understand the person on the other end very well because i am in my car and there is road noise or the connection is bad. if someone leaves a voicemail, you have to dial your voicemail, enter your password, listen to the pre-recorded "you have 1 new message. first message.." all to hear "hey, it's so and so, give me a call when you have a chance". seriously? if you CALL me, PLEASE leave the reason you called in my voicemail, or it is an utter waste of time! and don't even get me started on having to sit through the 2 minutes of pre-recorded crap in order to leave someone a voicemail. does anyone EVER "press 5 to page this person"??

with my customers, i try to ask them what method they prefer. even if i hate talking on the phone, i will do so for my customers who prefer it. that is just good business. i wish the vendors i work with would take note. for example, i have 2 contractors who insist on calling me practically every day. not because there is an emergency or question, but just to "update" me, even when nothing has happened. i'm sure they think this is good customer service, but it drives me batty! i have been trying to get through to them that i am very busy and can't take 10 minutes 5 times a day to chat with them about nothing. even though i've told them i prefer texts, it doesn't seem to be sinking in. so i've resorted to ignoring their phone calls and then texting them back with "can't talk, what do you need?".

they still aren't getting the hint.

gobble gobble

2009-11-27T17:13:00.003-07:00

thanksgiving used to be my favorite holiday. not because of the food or drink or family time, but because it was the only 4 day weekend that i got to to take all year. now that my job is so much more flexible, the time off isn't as important to me. and lately i've been taking a look at people's holiday behaviors and traditions, and can't help but wonder if people do what they do because they *want to* or because you don't mess with tradition.

even as a kid, i've always thought that the macy's day parade was super cheesy. i don't understand the excitement over huge balloon cartoon characters. and don't get me started on the dance numbers..

you'd think as a frugal shopper, black friday would be right up my alley, right? the answer to that is not just no, but HELL NO. i can't understand why *anyone* would wake up early in the cold, stand in line, and run the risk of getting trampled to save $100 on a printer. i like to find my deals without so many people, preferably on the computer while in my jammies. i save my energy for the day after Christmas sales, which are much less crowded.

this year jared had to work, and i had 4 options on how to spend my holiday.
#1) just me, the pups, and a big pumpkin pie
#2) hang out with my friend marc and his two bachelor buddies
#3) dinner with my friend jess and her family in castle rock
#4) 4 mile turkey trot with my friend deb and dinner at her house afterwards, pups included

since i am now facing the realities of looking good in a wedding dress, i opted for #4 and planned to be ready at 8am to make our race costumes*.

thursday morning, i woke up with a killer sore throat and felt a cold coming on. i knew deb wouldn't believe that i was sick, so i decided to load up on throat lozenges and just take it easy during the walk.

our costumes took a little longer to make than we anticipated, so by the time we checked into the race, we were already in the last wave, the family fun run. we started the race and right after passing the 1 mile walk, a friend in our group wanted to cut across the park and finish early, "before they run out of beer!". suddenly, i started to see the appeal of these races and realized why so many people participated.. it's not the exercise, it's the party afterwards!

luckily, several others in our group, myself included, wanted to keep walking. so we did another mile and a bit, and then we walked by the bathrooms. some people had to go, so we stopped, fully intending to keep going. but then we passed the beer garden and decided that we would just take a quick stop to have a beer and then finish the race. i'm sure you can guess how well that plan worked. before we knew it, they were packing up the beer garden and shooing us out. the race was over, and we hadn't even crossed the finish line or returned our shoe timer chips. oops.

the rest of the day was fairly uneventful - we cooked and ate and drank and burped and loosened our pants and watched movies. we were interrupted for about 30 minutes by my friends 23 yr old roommate and her guy friends who stopped by on their way to the game. after listening to their stupid, 23-yr old banter, i felt about 100 years old, but i digress.

throughout the day, my sore throat started to develop into a full blown cold, which i am still battling today. i decided to take my pie with me and leave early because i'm pretty sure i was grossing everyone out with all my sniffling.

but even with my cold, i had a great day - the trot was definitely outside my comfort zone at first, but something i realized that i enjoyed and could do again. it's so nice to have the freedom to do what i *want* on my holiday's, instead of what is expected, and that's a tradition i hope to stick with.

*which consisted of t-shirts that said "goofy gobbler" on the front and "shake your tail feathers" on the back, along with a headband and tail made out of real turkey feathers that deb found on the internet. they were quite the attention grabbers at the race.

say yes to the dress

2009-11-25T20:22:00.003-07:00

i received a call from the bridal shop 3 weeks ago saying that my dress was in. this made me more anxious than i would have thought.

i have never been the type of girl who dreamed about her wedding dress. when i got engaged, the dress choices were so overwhelming. i just wanted to find something that looked ok on me and didn't cost a fortune and get the heck out of the dress shop. there is something about being the center of attention and surrounded by expensive white delicate material that is very unnerving to me.

the first time i went shopping was with my mom and my friend erica. we went to a little boutique in seattle and i cursed myself for not wearing cuter undies. i was very nervous because i am not thrilled with my body right now and was convinced that i would be the only girl in the world who couldn't find a wedding dress that would look good. to my surprised, there were a few that i liked, but i refused to buy them because it was my first foray into dress shopping.

the second time i went was with my mom and sister in law when they were visiting me in denver. we went to a larger store and started grabbing anything that i thought might work. three dresses into it, i put one on, looked in the mirror, and thought hmm.. this actually isn't that bad.. wait a minute.. do i have a WAIST?? my mom and sil both loved it, but i wanted to try on a few more*. so after rejecting 4 or 5 more dresses, i stopped and told my mom that i actually think the one we all liked was it, and, priced at half of what i was planning on spending, it was a deal i couldn't refuse.

so my mom and sil kind of squealed and had me put it back on and i studied myself, mentally taking note of what i needed to spend extra time on at the gym.. i wondered aloud if it was really the one.. could it be this easy? is it ok that i'm not over emotional and crying? is it ok that i am being so practical about this and will i end up not liking it as the wedding day nears? will i kick myself for not trying on 100's of dresses until i found one that i didn't want to take off?

since the price was right and the dress looked good, i decided to get it.

so today when i went into the shop to pick up my dress, i was a little nervous that it wouldn't fit or look as good as i thought it did the day i picked it out. to my relief, it zipped up just fine. and i still like it. it's not uber fancy or frilly, but you know what? neither am i! and that's when i smiled to myself and realized that i *had* found the perfect dress *for me*, and i'm sure with a few alterations, i will be over emotional and crying and refusing to take it off.

*had i given into my ocd, i would have tried on every dress under the sun just to make sure that there wasn't something better. luckily, we did not have the time for that. and i got tired after about 10 dresses - those suckers are heavy!

boring blog = boring life?

2009-11-22T10:16:00.005-07:00

a friend recently told me that my blogs have become way less interesting since i started dating jared. i do not deny this. fortunately, boring blogs don't mean that i have a boring life, it just means that i have less time to write about it.

when i was single, i didn't have someone to listen to my rants in person. i didn't have someone to tell about my day every night. now that i do, it seems like it's too much effort to post it here as well. i don't feel the need to get it out anymore.

plus there's facebook.

it's been hectic lately. i fell like time is zooming by. work has been having me travel to albuquerque and salt lake city 2 times per month. we have our house on the market and are fixing up the destroyed rental. the wedding is only 6 months away and i am trying to keep the planning on schedule. and the stress of having too much weight and not enough money are really starting to show.

and as wonderful as it is to live with j, sometimes the things we do are not always in my best interest. like when i should be going to the gym, yet i am sucked into some dumb show j is watching on animal planet. or i should be cooking some healthy meal, but agree with j that we should order pizza. or i should be not spending money, yet drop $200 on a new GPS because j doesn't have one. he is able to help me justify all my bad decisions. he adds an extra layer of needed will-power to do something good.

of course, we have had several discussions lately where he has been made aware of this. but ultimately, it is not his problem - it's still my (bad) decisions. so i'm stepping up. going to the gym. cooking a healthy meal. and he has started to become very supportive, even willing to start changing some of his habits.

we'll get it figured out, and i can stop making excuses.

it's been an expensive year

2009-09-07T09:11:00.004-06:00

so i've always thought that any anxiety or stress i felt was directly related to the events that occur in my life. i also always thought that when those events are over, the stress will go away. what i'm realizing now is that it's just replaced by something equally stressful. 2009 has been a very anxiety-ridden year so far. a little run down.

january-april: spent all our free time fixing up the quitman rental and maxed out our credit cards doing so.
february: huge tree in our backyard falls down in the wind storm, causing $8K worth of damage and a month of dealing with the insurance company.
april: jared proposes (yay!) - start planning wedding and figuring out where we'll get the money
leak in fenton rental leads to mold growth in basement and months of dealing with contractors and insurance.
may: j gets into a car accident and it costs $2k to fix his jeep. i find out that j owes 3 years of back taxes.
june: tenants in fenton house get kicked out by social services and the city says that the house is uninhabitable. this is a blessing in disguise, as the tenants were HORRID, BUT we can't afford to have an empty house right now.
july: j's jeep broke down and we were forced to buy a new car. we got a used subaru forester and now have another car payment. j finally gets his crotchrocket into the shop so we can get it fixed up to sell and it costs $1700 to get it running again.
july-august: months dealing with contracts and insurance adjustors lead to a $18K insurance payment, but the work still hasn't started because the check is made out to the mortgage company and i have to jump through all their hoops to get things fixed.
august: we decide to put the quitman house on the market, and have to deal with the annoyances of trying to sell a tenant occupied house.

do you see a pattern here?

some reasons why we appear to make good money on paper, yet have none.
*i have not yet received a commission check this year because i am about 40K behind my sales goal.
*j was forced to take a 20% paycut at his job
*we have been paying two mortgages for 6 out of the last 8 months.
*we have paid cash for the following:2 insurance deductibles ($1000 each), 3 separate vehicle repairs ($4500 total), an engagement ring ($3000), and wedding downpayments ($2500).

now we have drained our savings, maxed our cards, and have 2 houses, a jeep, and a bike that we desperately want to sell.

too bad no one is buying..

2009-04-08T16:39:00.001-06:00

i'm getting married!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i heart freebies

2009-01-25T09:40:00.001-07:00

some cool girl put together this site full of freebies that she's personally tried out - no more sifting through loads of crappy links to find out that you actually have to purchase something to get your "free" sample!

the pink wallet

another excellent shopping trip

2009-01-09T17:01:00.004-07:00

here is the rundown:

container store:
returned $31.71 worth of christmas items that i received and wasn't going to use
purchased: receipt file, paper file for jared, travel toiletries case, travel makeup bag, small reusuable shopping bag
total cost after gift card redemption: $8.09

walgreens:
transferred a prescription to receive a $25 gift card
purchased: 2 bottles of water, 3 bottles of flintstones gummy vitamins, 1 bottle of one-a-day for men vitamins, 2 bottles of fructis styling products, 1 package of 9 volt batteries, 3 eyeliners.
total before sale: $77
total after sale before coupons: $61.94
total after coupons: $47.94
total after rebates: $27.95
total after $10 register reward earned for buying the vitamins: $17.95
total cost after giftcard: $0

the limited ( i needed a suit and some work clothes for my sales meeting next week)
purchased: 1 necklace, 1 ring, 1 brooch, 2 pairs work pants, 1 pair jeans, 1 blazer, 1 cardigan sweater, 1 cami, 1 shirt to wear under suit. everything except the jewelry and 1 pair of pants was full price. (the jewelry and 1 pair of pants were on super clearance and their tag prices totaled $29.36)

i don't think the clerk should have given me so many discounts, but she was super nice and i'm not gonna complain!

first she took off $8.99 from the jewlery, even though that was the highest priced item and the clearance jewelry wasn't buy 2 get one free like the others.
the she took 50% off of the higher priced pair of pants (they were buy one get 50% off, but is should have been for the lower priced item) so i saved another $34.75.
she gave me a 15% discount on every item because i am a student and it's a special they have going right now. that equaled: $43.69
then she took of $30 for a coupon that i had brought in with me
then she gave me another 15% discount because i used my limited card (i won't have interest for 90 days, AND i get free pant hemming!).
my total, had i not received any discounts besides the clearance items would have been: $360.98
what i actually paid: $226.51
this is a savings of ~37%

total spent out of my pocket for $477.78 worth of merchandise? $234.60
savings percent? 51%

i rock.

2009!

2009-01-01T13:01:00.003-07:00

i am very excited about 2009. i have a fantastic boyfriend who will most likely propose this year. i love my job and am getting better and better at it every day. i will finally graduate with my MBA in december.

also, i plan to get the bulk of my debt paid off this year while j and i live on one salary. i'm excited about getting the debt gone and finally be able to save some money. this will be a huge weight off my shoulders. j and i are trying to plan out our financial future and finally make our money start working for us!

we also found the reward that we're going to do if both j and i meet our goals. he needs to stop smoking, and i need to lose 20 pounds. our friends are planning a trip to mexico at the end of april, so we decided that would be our reward! that gives us 5 months to meet our goal - and since we both really want this trip, we can encourage each other and have something to look forward to!

below is the plan on how i'm going to meet my goal. i only need to lose 20 pounds to meet my challenge goal, but if i'm able to stick to my plan, i might be able to lose 35-40. if i lost 40 pounds, i would be at a very comfortable weight and a size 8. 55 pounds would put me at my highschool weight and a size 6 - but i am not even going to think about that until i reach my first goal.

i plan to start out slow and add more each month. i also plan to allow myself one cheat day per week, where i can eat whatever i want. otherwise i will have visions of french fries and pizza dancing through my head.

January:
Goal: Lose 5 pounds
- play my wii fit* for at least 2 1/2 hours a week (can be 1 hour 2 days and 30 min 1 day, or 30 min every day - however i can fit into my schedule)
- phase out restuarant eating to <2 times a week (i'm sad to say its at about 3-5 times now)
- eat at least 1 fruit/veggie per day (not including things in recipes - this is extra)
- order water/tea instead of diet soda at restaurants

February:
Goal: Lose 7 pounds (12 pounds total)
- add in another hour of other exercise per week (3 1/2 hours)
- do some sort of activity at least 5 days a week
- find healthy receipes and focus on finding things both j and i like and will eat - collect 10 recipes that we can rotate through the month
- eat at least 2 extra fruit/veggies per day
- phase out restaurant eating to <1 time per week

March:
Goal: Lose 8 pounds (20 pounds total)
- add in another 15 minutes of exercise, for a total of 60 minutes, 5 days a week
- add in more whole grains and try to cut out white bread

April:
Goal: Lose 5 pounds (25 pounds total)
- work on maintaining current lifestyle
- start attending weekly yoga classes

if i am having a hard time meeting my goals, i will cut out alcohol and see if that helps. i don't drink too much right now - maybe a glass or two of wine 2-3 times a week. but if i'm not seeing a loss, i can cut it down a bit.

hopefully i will have the motivation i need this year! i have a trip riding on it, and i won't want to let down j if he is able to meet his challenge and i can't - because then neither of us can go on the trip!

*the hard activities - the fun balance games are extra

day after christmas = best shopping day ever!

2008-12-26T17:35:00.005-07:00

today i hit the after christmas sales to get some good deals. i try *really* hard to not buy christmas decorations and things before christmas because they always go 50%-75% off the day after!

here's a summary of my loot:

petsmart - christmas treats and toys 50% off

everything in this photo was $33.70. but i had a $5 coupon and a $25 gift certificate, so I only paid $3.70. hopefully these chews will last a few months!

then i went to target and got the following at 50% off:
1 can mulling spices, 2 cans of christmas cookie sprinkles, 3 travel coffee mugs (one electrically keeps the beverages warm), 2 cool pillows for my couch, 2 rugs for the kitchen, 8 red placemats, 3 catnip toys, 2 packages of dog treats, 3 packages of cat treats, 3 ornaments, 1 snowman candle, 1 can chicken spice rub, 1 can beef spice rub, package of 3 extension cords, set of queen flannel sheets, 1 bathroom hand towel, package of 4 kitchen towels, table runner, kitchen towel/potholder set, tablecloth, 2 snowman candle holders, 2 votive candle holders, 1 package of napkins, and one decorative "jingle bell tree". total spent: $157.85

i also stopped by jc penney because i had a coupon, but they didn't have much and there were a ton of annoying people there. i did still get 2 ornaments (75% off) and a $50 waffle maker for $20. we've been wanting a waffle maker for awhile!

i wanted to go to cost plus and check out their decorations and holiday wine, but on my way there i got a call from a prospective tenant and had to go show the house. i may try to head over there tomorrow if i have some time.

then i went to the gap.com and got a cute striped hat, and a nice wool coat and some dressier pants for j (i think the coat will be his anniversary present). everything was on sale and then i got an additional 25% off with the code "sale". value: approximately $225.. and i spent just over $100 which included shipping and tax.

i also went to walgreens and transferred a prescription, receiving a $25 gift card in the process!

all these savings will make up for having to pay full price for the wii* fit and all the accessories i'm sure we'll have to buy!

*j's dad got us a wii for christmas!

resolutions

2008-12-26T16:43:00.004-07:00

j and i have decided to have a little competition.. since he can't seem to quit smoking, and i can't seem to lose 15 pounds.

at first, it was going to be the first one to their goal would get a special prize and the looser would have to do something embarrassing.

but i couldn't think of a prize good enough, or a punishment embarrassing enough to actually motivate me. i have been trying to lose 15 pounds for years, obviously i have a hard time finding something to motivate me. the standard ones like looking better, feeling better, etc just don't seem to be enough. darn high self esteem and boyfriend that loves me just the way i am. plus, i would rather j stopped smoking anyway.

so then we thought that we could make it a mutual goal and plan a prize for both of us - but we don't get it until we both reach our goal. that way, we can encourage each other and it's just a win-win situation. i think we're going to plan an elaborate weekend trip or something. we have a week to work out all the details, since the challenge starts on jan 1.

the other thing we want to do in 2009 is get our finances in order. i have decent credit, but a bit of debt.. j has no debt and makes good money, but has lousy credit. we're going to attempt to live on just his salary in 2009 and use mine to pay off debt and save. it's going to be tighter than we're used to, but at least his salary covers all our bills and a bit of spending money for both of us. i think i'll do ok with it, but j is an impulse-shopper that doesn't keep track of things too well so we'll see. our spending money is going to be cash, so as long as he remembers to go to the atm every week, we should be fine.

i love the new year.. fresh starts and new changes.. things always seem so promising!

get out of my way!

2008-12-18T17:46:00.003-07:00

i was driving to the movie theater this past weekend with j, my brother, and my SIL. we went to see 4 christmases, which had its cute moments, but vince vaughn gets annoying after awhile. plus i didn't like reese witherspoon's bangs. but overall it wasn't bad.

to get to the theater, i had to turn left from california (a one way) onto 14th (another one way). there were people still entering the crosswalk about 30 seconds AFTER the red hand stopped flashing and i had the green light. these people were just moseying along, oblivious to the fact that it was *my* turn and they should have waited for the crosswalk light to turn green. one girl was even texting as she slowly walked across the street.

i got fed up waiting for them and honked.

a guy in the group flipped me off and yelled something at me.. i'm not sure what, but i returned the gesture to him as i drove by. jerk.

seriously. if you're crossing against the light, you should at LEAST hussle a little and look sorry for making me wait!

do these stripes make me look fast?

2008-12-10T13:32:00.006-07:00

this is my car.

i know. it's super cute.

and apparently, invisible.

i have owned this car for almost 3 years. and i have been hit 3 times.

#1: summer 2006 - was parked at a friends house and someone in a large SUV backed into me. i had a huge dent in the hood from their ball hitch. fortunately, they were decent enough to leave a note and paid the $1500 repair bill.

#2: labor day weekend 2007 - was driving home from going out and a tweeker kid ran a stop sign and t-boned me. shattered the driver window, mangled the driver door. thank god no one was hurt. he was driving his friends mom's car. i didn't want to call the police because although i was ok to drive, i had been drinking that night and wasn't sure if i would register on a breathalyzer. i think the kid was on something too because he didn't want to call the police either. i was smart enough to get the license plate. i filed a police report the next day, saying that it was late and i didn't feel safe waiting for the cops to show up and thought it would be ok because no one was hurt. the owner of the car's insurance paid the $3500 repair bill.

#3: fall 2008 - was parked in front of my house. went outside and saw that my back hatch door was bashed in and there was red paint where it had been hit. no note. i filed a police report and then played detective in my neighborhood for weeks, checking the front of every red vehicle i saw. nada. so i sucked it up and claimed it on my insurance. its going into the shop this week. buh-bye $1000 deductable. i have a feeling it was a friend/family member of the immigrant family across the street - they are always parking in front of my house and dropping off or picking people up. and i'll bet dollars to doughnuts that they don't have car insurance. fuckers.

so not only do i seem to get hit a lot, i have about twice as many close calls. maybe only 10% of them are my fault. today i experienced 2 within an hour of each other.

#1: turning left onto colorado from 40th street. car in front of me slams on its brakes, so i slam on mine. turns out a stupid double-long fed ex truck was doing a U-TURN on a RED LIGHT on colorado blvd and got in the way of the guy in front of me. i passed the fed ex truck and honked. the guy behind me was riding my tail and when we got onto I-70, he sped up to pass me, honked, and flipped me off! WTF did *I* do? i hate that.

#2: going straight in the old navy parking lot. some lady pulls out and turns RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. i slam on my brakes and lay on the horn. i was literally inches away from hitting her. i double checked to make sure i didn't run a stop sign or anything, and of course, i had the right of way.

is it because my car is small and people just don't SEE me? or are there more idiot drivers on the road now more than ever? i think i might have my insurance deductible lowered...

time to sink some money into the houses

2008-12-07T16:42:00.003-07:00

i don't know if i ever mentioned that i am the landlord of two rental houses. the tenants in one of my houses just gave notice and they will be moving out this month, which means that i need to find some new renters. i put ads up all over and actually have a showing tomorrow, so that's great! anyhow, the house is old and a lot of the stuff in it isn't very nice, so we decided that we're going to put some money into it and make it a nicer place to live for the new tenants. here is what we need to do:

replace carpet in 2 bedrooms and the basement

paint every room

install new ceiling light fixtures in bedrooms

replace bathroom tile, toilet, vanity, mirror, and light fixture in both bathrooms

repair showers in both bathrooms

re-tile kitchen floor, install garbage disposal

it's a lot, but we're going to do it now and are looking at it like a practice house-flip. today we went shopping and found the carpet and light fixtures. the carpet place had remnants and we were able to find two matching high quality carpet pieces for the bedrooms. the basement is a different carpet, but the guy gave us a $0.50/sq ft discount. we also paid for installation, because we have no idea how to do it. total for ~400 sq feet of carpet + installation: $777

then we went next door to the lighting place that is moving and having a huge 20%-60% off sale. we bought 2 bathroom light fixtures and the 2 bedroom light fixtures. they were 20% and 40% off and we only paid $110! they would have been well over $200 at home depot, so i think we got a good deal.

i've been looking on craigslist, and between that and the habitat for humanity thrift store, i think we can get the bathroom vanities, cabinets, sinks, toilets, tile etc for pretty cheap.

then i started thinking.. you know, i really don't like the vanity, sink, and cabinet in my bathroom... so i suggested to j that we take those out and put them in the rental house.. then we can get nice ones for us! we might be spending more now than we would just buying cheap ones, BUT we've been wanting to replace ours anyway and now we won't have to buy other ones for one of the bathrooms. he thought that was a good idea, as long as we could find something we liked that was reasonably priced. we want one of those vessel sinks and cabinetry in a dark wood finish.

they are not reasonably priced.

here's an example of one i like.

$665! and that's just for the base.. it doesn't even include the sink.

to make matters more difficult, our bathroom is so tiny that the vanity can't be deeper than 15". that's not very big (standard is 22"). so what i would like to do is find a 15" x 30" cabinet in a dark wood with some drawers or storage space and then drill the holes to install a vessel sink (~$100 for a new one on craigslist) and faucet.

how do i do an internet search for that? i can't figure out what it would be called.. i've tried vanity base, cabinet, and a few other things. i'm not finding what i want. any ideas?

i could always do a pedistal sink, but we have limited storage as it is, so i wanted to avoid that option.

j is planning to take a woodworking class next year. i can't wait until he can just MAKE us what we want.

christmas destruction

2008-12-03T12:06:00.004-07:00

for those of you that know me, you know that i have lost my fair share of personal belongings to the antics of my dogs. luckily, the incidents are getting fewer and farther between, but occasionally i am still greeted by a shredded possession.

today it was this

how silly of me to think that i could actually wrap all my presents and put them under the tree! especially ones that are technically food products. this one was for my mom's husband tom - a gift pack of spices from the savory spice shop* in denver. i'm going to take it in and see if they'll repackage the gift box for me - at least they didn't get through the spice jars!

this reminded me of a story my mom always tells about their first christmas when our dog champ was a puppy. this was before i was born, my parents were just married, and when they came home from work, there was wrapping paper and presents strewn all about the room. it turns out that my aunt paula had sent champ a bone and he tore through everything looking for it. my mom and dad had no idea who had given them what, which made thank you notes fun, i'm sure. dear grandma, thank you for the (check one): levis, book, frying pan, sweater. love sandie and luther.

and, because you all know i'm a list person, i'm going to try to compile a list of things my dogs have eaten over the past 2 1/2 years. i don't even want to think about the monetary value.

15 pairs of shoes
20 pairs of underwear
5 expensive bras
1 belt
2 ball caps
3 t shirts
1 bazillion white athletic socks
100 black dress socks
3 remote controls
1 fabric couch
1 black leather couch
1 brown leather couch cushion
1 brown leather couch leg
4 futon mattresses
3 corners of baseboard woodwork
4 dining room chair legs
1 dining room table leg
2 dog beds
2 down comfortors
6 pillows
1 bottle of lotion
25 pens/markers/highlighters
1 autographed book
2 coupon books
2 paper back books
1 library book
3 ski hats
1 scarf
1 glove
1 bottle of thyroid medication
1 basketball belonging to neighbor kid
2 vaccuum cleaner attachments
1 christmas present

i know i'm missing some.

anyone else wanting to see marley & me on christmas? it will be like watching jerry springer when you're having some family drama.. suddenly, your life doesn't seem so bad!

*AWESOME store! all blended locally, reasonably priced, and yum! i highly recommend to the foodies out there..

and... i'm back!

2008-12-02T10:01:00.003-07:00

so i know i kind of suck at blogging sometimes. i think it's during the summer when i slack off because there are just so many other things going on. when it starts getting colder, i spend a lot more time surfin' the net and am inspired to post more. the problem is when i take too much time off, i don't know where to start again. that's how i was keeping a journal too.. i'll have daily entries for 6 months and then nothing for 5 years.

a lot has been happening with me since last may. here is a rundown:

j moved in and we are very happy. he's going to propose soon, judging by the things he's saying.. i just don't know when - which is good!
i turned 30 in june and went skydiving. i didn't like it as much as i thought i would. in fact, i was absolutely terrified and have the video to prove it.
my baby brother got married in june to the awesomist girl ever - i love them!
in august i ended up taking over for the property management company that was managing my 2 rental properties. suffice it to say that they weren't doing their job and now i am a full blown landlord and i hate it. i need to get these houses refinanced and then hire a new company. however, j and i are getting a lot of practice fixing things up.
my job is still fabulous and i love it.
j brought home a stray kitten that he found on the drill rig. now the animals outweigh the humans. it's fun to watch him play with the dogs.
we've devised a plan to get all our debt paid off and be financially secure by 2011. then we can start having the babies and all that good stuff. :) we're going to live off of his salary and use mine to pay off debt/save for as long as we can. i never want to have debt again. ever.
still in school. 2 classes this semester. 2 next semester. 1 in the fall. then i'm DONE.
any extra money we do have has been going into the house. we figure we're going to be here a little longer than we thought, so we have been doing some great upgrades. i will post pictures if i find time.

that's about it for the major stuff. i've been kind of a recluse lately - definitely not going out as much. between work and school and the 3 houses and j's crazy work schedule and the pets, i really don't have much time to do anything else. and i really can't drink as much as i used to. i'm not complaining. it will help when we're living frugally next year!

keep checking back - i have a feeling i'll be posting a lot more for awhile.

how i keep my house clean, my puppy exercised, and myself entertained

2008-05-16T07:53:00.003-06:00

what's next, doggie diets?

2008-04-07T10:06:00.004-06:00

j and i were doing a little shopping yesterday when we came across these.

Portioned controlled snack pouches for dogs.

Seriously? Are we counting calories for our dogs now? Don't we have more important things to worry about? Next thing you'll be hearing about is the Canine Obesity Epidemic. Just what we need - another reason for the rest of the world to laugh at us.

ex marks the spot

2008-03-20T10:09:00.007-06:00

j was talking about his ex last night. i usually have the mindset that ex's are ex's for a reason, and so i don't get bent out of shape when a current boyfriend talks about them. but something last night hit a nerve. maybe because we're getting so serious.. maybe because it's that time of the month. i have no idea.. but i was bothered because it bothered me.

this prompted me to reflect on past relationships. thinking about good times we had. wondering what they're doing in their life. do they ever wonder about me? what memories do they have?

i googled the only two significant ones to see if i could gleam any information about their lives. the one from college. my first. now married. living in boulder with his wife and 2 dogs. a perpetual graduate student. no information found on the second one. probably a good thing, but maddening to me.

i know that i wouldn't have been happy with either one of them. i should assume that j feels the same way about his and let that little reality check silence the insecurity.

just when you thought you've heard everything

2008-03-13T08:34:00.002-06:00

Woman sits on boyfriends toilet for 2 years.

since i am feeling generous

2008-03-05T15:55:00.004-07:00

here are some more good deals for ya.

i can't quite pull this off, but still cute!
victorias secret string bikini - $5.99
if you use the code BSEXY, you get a free tote bag.
if you also use the code SP89829, you get free shipping.

Print out the form for the Hershey's Mega Movie Ticket Offer (3/1/09) Limit 4 per household.
Collect and send in 15 Mega Movie Bonus Points from specially marked packages of TWIZZLERS, HERSHEY’S MINIATURES, HERSHEY’S NUGGETS, KISSES, REESE’S and YORK products to receive one FREE movie admission valued up to $8.50. Mega Movie 10% bonus bags of TWIZZLERS candies are worth 3 points each. Mega Movie 10% bonus bags of various Hershey’s candies are worth 5 points each. Combine point values for a total of 15 points for redemption.

new customer for redbox DVD rental? use code DVDONME for a free movie.

get a free noxema razor. there was a coupon in sunday's paper - and here is a try-me-free form.

happy shopping!

i heart walgreens

2008-03-05T15:24:00.005-07:00

for those of you that haven't discovered walgreens easy saver catalog yet, you are missing out!

here is a run down of everything i bought and how much it ended up costing me.

12 bars of zest soap
4 bars of olay soap
8 bars of ivory soap
3 packages of cadburry chocolate eggs
1 tube of colgate toothpaste
1 bottle of garnier nutritioniste skin serum
1 bottle of thermadent mouth rinse
2 bottles of olay bodywash
1 bottle of garnier hair gel
1 bottle of old spice bodywash
4 cans of healthy choice soup
2 fuzzy dog toys
1 package of breathe right nose strips
1 package of gel pens
1 bottle of tide
2 birthday cards
1 tube of vaseline hand cream
1 gillette razor with blades
3 trial size herbal essence shampoos
3 trial size herbal essence conditioners

that's a lot of stuff, right? let's see how much i paid (including sales tax).
total before coupons and rebates: $121.66
less manufacturers coupons: $ - $9.60
less register rewards i earned for buying all that soap and bodywash and the razor: -$37.00
less rebates from items in the easysaver catalog: -$29.96
less 10% rebate bonus for putting the rebate on a giftcard: -$2.99
GRAND TOTAL: $42.11

that's right folks, i saved $79.55 just by being a smart shopper

there are two more free after rebate items that the store was out of and I need to get. some listerine mouthwash ($3.99) and some naturemade vitamins ($8.00). that's another $13.19 in savings (counting the extra 10% on the giftcard). i will buy $12 worth of soap to get the $12 in register rewards and then use that to buy the mouthwash and vitamins. that will add another $25.19 to my savings - making it $104.74!

and i won't have to buy soap for the rest of the year!

i'm ready

2008-03-03T16:13:00.003-07:00

i felt it. friday night. returned the i love you. no weirdness. it feels right. this one is the one. besides just feeling it, i have noticed myself acting differently than i have in past relationships.

namely, i don't want to change him.

i can live with his quirks and flaws and imperfections. even the SNORING. and in return, he will live with mine. the positives far outweigh the negatives.

thinking that you can find a mate who has no negative traits is setting yourself up for a lifetime of dissapointment.

nagging always has the opposite effect. dwelling on things that you can't change is the fastest way to drive yourself crazy.

if i want to get some sleep, i need to suck it up and invest in a good pair of ear plugs.

i was caught off guard

2008-02-24T14:16:00.003-07:00

so things with me and j have been getting pretty serious, pretty fast.

i've always figured that when i meet the right person, i'll just know. i've dated so much and have collected enough life experience to decide pretty quickly what will work and what won't. j seems to subscribe to the same school of thought. which is why it doesn't seem weird to me (although sometimes i think it should) that after nearly a month of dating we are already talking about the future.. marriage, kids, houses, finances. and we both are on the same page with all the major issues.

of course, it's all still talked about in speculation - if's and might's and maybe's. to minimize the thoughts of "whoa, are we going too fast here?" that might creep up.

yesterday we were at home depot, looking for parts for the peephole that j has insisted he wants to put in my door (to keep me safe). we're walking down the nuts & bolts aisle hand in hand when suddenly he stops, looks at me, and says "i love you.".

i was so caught off guard that i didn't know what to do. i smiled and kissed him and squeezed his hand, but remained silent. the whole time i'm just thinking whooooa and how i have no idea how to respond. 5 years ago i would have immediately said "i love you too!", not caring whether i really meant it or not.. or maybe more importantly, not actually knowing if i meant it or not. when you're younger it's something that is a little easier to throw around.

while i'm thinking about what to say, he says it again.

"i mean it, i love you"

i gave him a huge hug and told him that i could feel the same way but that it was too soon for me to actually verbalize it. and he took it well - and said he understood and no pressure and take all the time i need.. and know that he loved me and that it wasn't a term he threw around loosely either.

i'm thrilled that i may have stumbled upon the right guy for me and i'm trying not to be too cautious or jaded or scared or skeptical. and just let it happen.

sometimes it's hard to accept the reality that things may be happening the way you always thought they would.

i've been in limbo for awhile, anticipating the next step. will i be brave enough to take it?

"so, did your fridge throw up?"

2008-02-01T16:18:00.000-07:00

j's response when i told him that i bought some regular high fat peanut butter for the mouse traps.

he likes to make fun of my organic, healthy food.

and i still didn't catch any mice. i will be buying different traps tomorrow.

walkway fairy

2008-01-31T15:23:00.000-07:00

i bundled up this morning to shovel off the 4" of snow from my walkway. and when i stepped outside, my walk had already been shoveled and sprinkled with ice melt! even the path that went around to the back yard (which i never bother doing).

i thought it was my new *boyfriend* j and got all excited because what a sweet thing to do for me, right? but when i texted him to say thank you, he said it wasn't him. i have no idea who else it could have been, but it made my day!

so um, yeah, that's right, i said boyfriend. j came over last night and made me dinner. i was supposed to go to his house, but since i hadn't been feeling well, he came over to me instead. the boy made HOMEMADE pasta and a delicious HOMEMADE sauce. he also brought over salad with croûtons and HOMEMADE ranch dressing, bread, wine, and sparkling water. and movies. and treats for the doggies. and it was DELICIOUS.

after dinner he asked me if he could call me his girlfriend because he wants to be my boyfriend. how cute is that? i told him that i would think about it - because although i am not seeing anyone else, i haven't had a "boyfriend" since si.. and so i need to get used to the idea. he said he was smitten with me.

i'm going to let him woo me for as long as i can. it's nice having someone smitten with you.

operation "eek a mouse", day two, failure

2008-01-30T08:17:00.000-07:00

since the mice didn't touch the natural organic almond butter i placed in the traps for them 2 nights ago, and since i have been sick and didn't get to the grocery store yesterday, the traps got baited with my laughing cow spreadable lowfat cheese. it's soft and i really smeared it all into the trap so they couldn't just grab it and run.

last night i heard one of the traps snap!

this morning i peered gingerly around the kitchen stove.. and..

NADA. AGAIN.

except that this time, the little fuckers had managed to eat almost all the cheese off of the traps without setting it off. one was practically licked clean. one had been triggered, but it was empty.

they're either really small or really smart.

operation "eek a mouse", day one, failure

2008-01-29T08:14:00.001-07:00

i had an exterminator come out to take a look at my mouse problem. they want $600 to spray some "pet safe" chemical (is there such a thing?) outside my house and then trap the mice.

i decided that i would try to do it myself first. since i can't use poison (due to the doggies eating anything in sight, potentially including poisoned mice), i bought a bunch of old school spring loaded mouse traps. last night i baited them and put them all over the kitchen floor, expecting to face several dead mice in the morning.

nada.

my friend thinks it's because i used organic almond butter. it was a toss up between that and laughing cow spreadable cheese. it's all i had.

"them mice ain't that high-falootin'! you need to git yerself some skippy loaded with trans-fat! or better yet, some cheese-whiz!"

this is why dating in real life can be better

2008-01-28T11:50:00.001-07:00

my friend j insisted on setting me up with her brother. she talked him up and he sounded great, so i agreed to meet him. we all went out this weekend and had a great time.

i really like him and the feeling is mutual. i'm glad she introduced us because if i had seen an online dating profile for him, i probably wouldn't have given him a chance based on the following:

smoker, republican, lives in the suburbs

and while the above things may become an issue down the road, i'm trying to not worry about it right now. because there are so many other things that i like about him. and it's all about give and take, right?

except for the smoking thing.. he'll need to be willing to quit for me if it gets serious.

when the cat is away..

2008-01-24T12:18:00.001-07:00

or in my case, when the dogs are away, the mice DO play!

i am heading out of town today for a business meeting and my dogs are staying with a friend.

just right now, i found a dead mouse in the dog water bowl and not 2 minutes later another one scampered across my floor and is hiding behind my snowboard.

i actually screeched and tried to jump on a chair.

time to call the exterminator, i think.

a little embarrassed

2008-01-21T17:37:00.001-07:00

so i was walking into the bathroom at the corner bakery today while another person was walking out. a person that looked like a man. so much in fact, that i did a double take and tried to get a glimpse of the bathroom door to make sure that i was actually in the ladies room.

the person caught me looking at them with a confused look and said

"it's ok, i just have a haircut."

i'm sure if i had had time to scrutinize them a little more closely, i would have realized that she was a woman. but i wasn't able to in the split second i had. i felt a little embarrassed for the woman. the quickness in replying to my look of confusion leads me to believe that this isn't the first time it's happened to her.

fat man! little jacket!

2008-01-20T11:53:00.000-07:00

i was out at fados last night. it wasn't too crowded and so i left my coat with my friends coats on some bar stools. no biggie.

about 30 min later i went over to get my coat and it wasn't there.

there was, however, a men's leather coat slung over the back of the chair.

i figured that someone had grabbed mine by mistake and would come back to claim theirs and return mine. that didn't happen.

i waited until they were shooing us out of the bar and breaking it down. no one came to claim the jacket.

so i wore it home. it was cold.

i don't want this jacket and i rather liked the one i had lost. i put an ad on craigslist, so maybe i will eventually find it.

the leather one looks like a tent on me, so i can only imagine what my coat must have looked like on the guy that tried to wear it home.

i just hope it's not split up the back!

a new me

2008-01-15T19:56:00.000-07:00

so my dear friend seth has decided to take it upon himself to be my personal trainer. which is AWESOME. we've been meeting at the gym every morning and doing the workouts that he planned for me. i'm not too concerned that they're from men's health - i'm just glad that i have someone holding me accountable for working out!

it's nice. i like working out. especially with a friend. i've always gone to the gym, but i think that i haven't really been working out to my full potential. these work outs are pushing me and i'm hoping that i'll actually see results. i'm so sore now that i can barely get out of my chair!

i have a ton of motivation this time. not only is my brothers wedding in 6 months, but in the past few weeks i have heard from 2 friends that guys they know have told them that i would be really hot if i lost a few pounds. it was hard for me to hear, but also necessary and motivating. one of those things that i always knew but never wanted to acknowledge that other people knew as well.

so that's been consuming a lot of my time. i've also been watching a lot of movies lately since they're free from the library and i don't have cable. oh, and i've decided not to say anything to my friend. the more i think about it, the more i feel like it would be a bad idea. i think i know the answer and i don't want to risk anything. being friends is good for me right now. i have other things to concentrate on.

risking the friendship

2008-01-07T16:29:00.000-07:00

i have this very special person in my life. from the moment we met, i just had this feeling that he was the one for me. we have amazing conversation and laugh so much and we're attracted to each other and he fascinates me and i just think the world of him. although he has his flaws, i think he's just about the greatest guy ever.

we never really dated per se, but we've always enjoyed a um.. special friendship.

i have spent months assuring him that i was cool with said special friendship and that he need not worry, as i would not confuse our special friendship with love or anything of that nature. i can separate and won't be attached. i said this partly because i thought it was true at the time and partly because i knew that's what i would have to say to get what i wanted. which i am apparently good at and sometimes bites me in the ass.

when this friendship started, he was not ready for a relationship and i didn't think i was either. but now time has passed and we've both talked about how we're ready for a relationship, but the topic of having one with each other has never come up.

of course it's all i think about.

so the other night he came over and in the morning he told me he wanted something to happen but that he shouldn't. normally i would be like, ah ha, a challenge and something would definitely happen. but this time i just let it go.

and i got the feeling that he wasn't expecting me to do that. and i also got the feeling that he wanted me to ask him why we aren't dating. and i also got the feeling that he hasn't made a move because he doesn't think i want it, even though i want it more than anything.

guys are pretty literal, and i am pretty convincing. and i'm also pretty sure that he can't read my mind.

but i kept quiet even though it was a good opportunity to have a discussion. i'm known for my blunt honesty and wanting everything to be clear to all parties involved, so i'm sure it wouldn't have been a shock to him.

so after mulling it over a bit, i've decided i'm going to say something when i get the opportunity. although i don't have a particularly good track record with this kind of situation (since i am apparently a very cool, super cute girl deemed undateable for some god forsaken reason by my guy friends*), i also know that i will drive myself crazy if i don't know the truth.

worst case scenario - i am totally embarrassed and hurt for awhile, but i get over it and we remain platonic friends.

best case scenario - we end up dating and get married and have lots of adorable babies.

i think i know in my heart which way it will turn out, but since i am a glutton for punishment as well as an eternal optimist, i need to find out for sure. then the healing process can begin and i can be emotionally available for the next one that comes along.

or maybe end up happily ever after.

*I will maintain that it has to have something to do with the extra 30 pounds i'm carrying around - because that is easier than thinking that i might have some sort of personality flaw.

some good deals

2008-01-04T14:53:00.000-07:00

thought you guys might be interested in some of the good deals i've found lately..

body shop clearance - lots of yummy smelling body washes and soaps and stuff for only $3!
http://tinyurl.com/376v3h

i had my cart stacked and then decided that even though it was a GOOD deal, i'm trying to save money and shouldn't spend $30 on body wash. but if you have the money to spend, you're getting a bargain! there's even a code for free shipping when you spend $30 - WEL319.

Rebates - print the form online, buy the product, and submit the form for your money back!
purell hand sanitizer
veet rasera bladeless razor kit
dawn direct foam dishsoap
meaty bone dog biscuits

free goodie bag worth $25 when you spend $15 in colgate palmolive products.

having no cable is harder than i thought

2008-01-03T15:59:00.001-07:00

not that i really miss any particular programs.. but i miss having the background noise of the tv on when i'm cooking or working or cleaning.

i have my music on instead, but it's not the same. i feel like i have all this free time now.. and i'm not sure what to do with it.

not your university library

2008-01-02T16:16:00.001-07:00

i went and got a public library card today. for some reason, the library option just never appealed to me. i thought they would have old, outdated books - nothing i would want to read, for sure. i thought it was a place for poor people to get on the internet and for students to check out reference books. of course, it doesn't help that the last library i was in was my college library!

i was at my friends house and ended up borrowing a bunch of books from him. he mentioned that he had bought most of them at the library book sale.

really?? but they're new authors.. and paperback.. and the library never has NEW stuff in it!?

no way, he replied, the library has a ton of stuff. they even have dvds and cds!*

so i went to the library closest to my house today and found a couple of books and a movie.

i still can't get over that this is all available for FREE. and i can keep them for 3 weeks. and they have branches everywhere!

now i think i can cancel netflix and save another couple hundred dollars per year. not to mention all the money i'm going to save from not buying books. i never read them again anyway.

*and magazines, i found out today!

cutting out the extra

2008-01-02T11:33:00.001-07:00

2008 is going to be a busy year. between my regular job and my soon-to-get second job and 2 MBA classes that meet 3 nights a week and 2 puppies to take care of and the 20 pounds i need to lose, i don't think i'll have a whole lot of extra time.

which is why i decided to see if i could survive without owning cable this year. i'm on the phone with comcast right now waiting to cancel it.

my cable is costing me $75 a month (with HD and DVR and all the good necessities). and i don't really watch it that much - it's background noise, really.

so by canceling, i will save $900 this year. it's a start.

i don't think i will be too deprived. i still have netflix and my playstation and the internet (which my company pays for). i think that you can watch most shows online now anyway - and my friend seth is going to hook up my computer to my tv so that i can watch it on the big screen.

i will be giving up a little bit of convenience, but i think i'll be ok and actually turn out enlightened from the process.

2008 by the numbers

2008-01-01T12:49:00.000-07:00

happy new year! let's take stock of what i have already accomplished in the first 12 hours of 2008.

drinks consumed: 5
other substances consumed: 2
people kissed: 4
girls kissed: 2
ass slapped: 12
beligerent drunk fights attempted to break up: 3
cute snoring boys i woke up next to: 1
fast food cravings thwarted by my inner skinny bitch: 4
hours slept: 6

i think i'm off to a good start

today is a good day to live in australia

2007-12-31T16:14:00.000-07:00

the outfit i have planned for tonight

the weather report for tonight

and on a slightly related note. diamond strength my ass.

i am rather smelly right now

2007-12-31T15:25:00.001-07:00

why can't i find a self tanning lotion that doesn't make me smell like a 13 yr old boy's stale gym sock?

for those of you who are on a computer all day

2007-12-31T09:09:00.000-07:00

here is a fun free game site where you either play a bingo style game or spin a lottery wheel to collect points that you can redeem for giftcards. i keep it on in the background while i do my other work.

here is the link - have fun!

resolutions

2007-12-30T10:55:00.000-07:00

new years resolutions. cliche? yes. high expectations? yes. something i do anyway? yup.

1) lose 20 pounds by may 1st. my brother is getting married in june and i really want to feel comfortable in my bridesmaid dress. i plan to do this by adding more fruits and veggies into my diet,cutting out processed foods and dairy, eating organic, and exercising more frequently. 5 pounds a month should be doable if i don't lose sight of the goal.

2) be 90% vegan by this time next year. i have been researching the vegan lifesytle over the past few months and have found that i really agree with it. i'm not a huge meat eater to begin with, so i don't think that will be a problem. but i do like my cheese. i have already been experimenting with vegan products and recipies and have found them to be SO healthy and tasty.

3) letting go of perfection. i have always procrastinated doing something because i couldn't do it perfectly. it's a crutch. and a lame one. it's better to try my best at something and enjoy the process instead of being obsessed with the end result.

4) take my dogs on more walks. now that burton can't go to the dogpark, i need to make sure that they both get their exercise. i owe it to them, even if it's just a quick walk around the block. i want this to eventually be a daily ritual.

5) pay down my debt. i will be getting another waitressing job after the new year and all the money i make will go to paying off my credit cards. i am at the start of a downward spiral and if i don't do something soon, i will be screwed when i'm older. i'm also going to save money by getting back into my couponing habit, trying to buy only the necessities, going to the library instead of buying books or renting movies, and not using the credit cards.

i think that's probably enough to keep me busy in 2008. i've already started working on everything except dog walking over the last few months, so it shouldn't be a sharp transition. and if i can let my perfectionism go out the window, i should be able to keep plodding on even if i slip up.

deep breath

2007-12-27T17:53:00.000-07:00

while driving along 1-70 with my mom the other day.

KATIE! Watch your speed!

i'm only going 65

you're going 70! and the speed limit is 55!

mom. i'm fine. i'm keeping up with traffic*

well that doesn't matter - you're still going above the speed limit. look, you're going faster than that person there (points out slow ass grandma car in right lane). you're going to get another ticket.

mom, the only time i get tickets is with the photo radar in a school zone.** besides, it's going to be 65 in a few miles.***

she had a death grip on the seat until we reached our destination, driving 70 the whole way. being a grown-up is fun.

*which was actually true and i think that's the safest way to drive
**also true
***again, true.

bone machine

2007-12-18T18:04:00.000-07:00

today at my favorite grocery store, sunflower market, i purchased a bunch of ingredients to make 5 vegan casserole and/or crock pot delights. this is my first actual foray into the vegan lifestyle, which i was convinced was probably the way to go when i read "skinny bitch".

there is a mushroom "tuna" (how chickpeas can substitute for tuna i have no idea) casserole in the oven. i will let you know how it turns out.

i also purchased 2 ~8" ham bones for the puppers. they each received a bone at approximately 5pm. it is now 6:03pm, and while kitsu has been chewing on her bone at an appropriate rate as pictured below..

burton somehow misunderstood the assignment.

i took it away from him as soon as i realized what he did - i don't think that it's good for him to have eaten the bone. hopefully it will pass without incident - the last thing i need it another trip to the vet. :(

this is why i keep procrastinating

2007-12-14T10:22:00.001-07:00

i got a 95% on the final project for my class this semester.

the one we were supposed to work on every week through the semester so that it didn't become too overwhelming.

the one that i knocked out the weekend before it was due.

the one i turned in thinking it wasn't quite complete, but was probably good enough.

is grading too easy in this program? or am i just a rock star?

i choose the latter.

you are a target market

2007-12-13T07:25:00.000-07:00

i am a product of consumerism and it disgusts me. i was thinking about this today when i was going through all my email and it was advertisement after advertisment for christmas presents and gift cards. this post was originally going to be about how silly it is that every company thinks that their product is the best christmas present and a rant against christmas spending.. but then i thought.. wait a minute, i am totally guilty of this too. probably not nearly to the extent of other americans - but it's there, and not just around christmas time either.

i have gone into debt buying new furniture and clothes and a car and god knows what else. hell, i had to get a second job to pay for it. i get on my high horse about the marketing and gluttony and materialism, but although i try to support local business more than chains and try to buy most things on sale, i still find myself spending $100 at target on things i don't really need. or buy new clothes even though i have a ton in my closet because i was influenced by an episode of "what not to wear". i feel a bit hypocritical.

there is a healthy balance that i just need to find. i think i've been close to it, actually, since realizing that i need to save money. it's all about distinguishing what you want from what you need. this is a hard thing to distinguish when you are bombarded with ads and commercials convincing you that their product is all you need to be happy.

i want to live this perfect, healthy lifestyle - be in control of my finances, not put crap into my body, pollute less.. but it's really, really difficult for me to do right now. and it all boils down to how many (or how few) $$$ i have in my pocket.

i blew off a date tonight

2007-12-12T18:52:00.001-07:00

we were supposed to meet for tapas and drinks at 8 tonight. around 4 pm, i decided i didn't really feel like going out tonight and didn't think i could muster the pre-requisite First Date Enthusiasm.

i have exchanged a few emails with this guy and he seems nice enough, but i just haven't gotten excited about the pictures he sent me. and there was nothing in the emails that made me particularly intrigued. honestly, i was just giving him a chance because my friend jess told me i should maybe think about taking more chances on guys that may not fit my ideal. just give them a shot, she said, if anything, at least you'll get a free dinner.

but after suffering through my last "just give them a shot" guy on saturday, i am a little gun shy.

so i sent him a text asking for a raincheck and apologized. at first i had the best intentions to actually cash it in.. and then i decided to myspace him. you know, just to see if there were any other pictures that made me a little more excited.

when i scrolled down the profile, i realized that i had probably just saved myself from sitting through another bad date.

height: 5'4"

that would explain the line in his email "..and i really dig short girls!"

i am 5'3" and i am short for a girl. and although i have lowered my height requirement down from the standard 6', to "at least a couple inches taller than me when i'm in heels", 5'4" just doesn't cut it.

i know this is shallow, but i also know that i will not be attracted to him. especially since there wasn't really a mental connection there in the first place.

so i figure i did us both a favor. i saved him some money and i saved me some time.

and i've decided that i want to go back to my old style of dating - only go out with someone if i am excited about them, not just for the sake of going out. i would rather spend the night at home than out somewhere trying to make conversation with someone i'm not into.

besides, 24phd came over last night and we made out like teenagers - so there.

creepy craigslist personal ads

2007-12-12T17:03:00.006-07:00

just a few i came across today.. are these people for real??

these are from the M4W section in denver.

Have You Ever Been To An XXX Theater? - 51
This has been a fantasy of mine and I think it would be pleasant to meet a lady who was comfortable enough with the subject to actually look at this as an enjoyable experience. Sorry is that offends you but I think one should do everything in life that intrigues us.What do you think?
I've been told that I am handsome, distinguished, communicative and sometimes erotic. Let's do this if you are the woman who is going to go with me.

eew. on a FIRST date? hmm.. wants to go to an XXX movie theater (do those even still exist?) yet is only "sometimes" erotic.

420-Booze-Food-Nice Place, all I need is you - 35
Let' meet at my place
Sex will be optional and up to you
I am a nice white guy
Divorced, no kids, sexy

apparently all i need are no standards.

Personal Priorities
I need 1 woman to love.

well, i guess he could be asking for 2 women.

WTG? - 43
This cant be that hard. Iam looking to meet outgoing, headstrong women that dont have ex-issues. Will send pic for pic. I could write a book on what i like in women, but just no time to be online.

WTF is WTG? guess who he just broke up with. a shy, passive woman with "ex-issues".

Married and lonely for the holidays - m4w - 40
I AM A MARRIED BLACK MALE with children. My marriege has been over for a long time. Why do I stay? because I have kids that I can not leave and financial reasons. Therefore I am looking for a women that can relate and may be in the same situation. I want to be with someone that needs intimacy, and a great listner. Also note, I give great hugs and massages. I consider my self a helpless romantic. I love to travel, eat good food, and drink Red Wine. Also note, I am not looking for a one night encounter. However I do LOVE TO EAT PUSSY so if you want to get licked right get with me. PLEASE NOTE I AM NOT DESPERATE I DON'T WANT TO JOIN SOMEONE'S CHAT LINE OR A DATING SITE SO PLEASE DON'T EMAIL THOSE LINKS. NO GAMES PLEASE.

"may be" his "marriege" has been over because his wife disagrees that he "licks right". please note that he is not desperate.

man seeking much older women - 29
im 29 6ft 200lbs. very attractive(really), nice body. Im not a freak. Just a normal sensitive, funny, laidback guy. I really want to please a older women between 50-70. Ill lick you, rub you, ad have sex with you. Just a one or three time thing. Nothing serious, just fun. Come on I know women still want it at that age. Dont be shy drop me a line. Maybe we can have a nooner today!

oh no, you're not a freak (really).

and this is why i no longer look for dates on craigslist.

i always have the best intentions

2007-12-10T08:23:00.000-07:00

i'm trying to get a kick start on my new years resolutions, which include going to the gym 5 days a week. i used to do it and loved it. i thought once i started working from home, it would be easier to go to the gym because i could, you know, go any time i wanted.

today i had a dentist appointment at 9 am. the dentist is really close to my gym. so last night i had the plan of getting up early and going to the gym before the dentist. i ended up waking up late, so that didn't happen.

and here is how the rest of my thought pattern went:

ok, i'll go to the gym after the dentist. but i can't wear my gym clothes to the dentist.. it's in cherry creek. they'll think i'm a slob. maybe i can take my clothes with me and change into them there. but i don't know where my gym bag is and i don't have any other cute bags to tote them in. plus i can't remember the combination to my lock. crap. if i go after the dentist i won't be home all morning. it will take from 9-10 at the dentist, then i won't probably be ready to work out until 10:30. an hour workout and it's 11:30 already. and i'll probably want to stop at target since it's right next door. but what is my clients call this morning and i'm not available?

and then the skinny bitch voice inside of me (who i've been trying to make appear more often) said "GET YOUR FAT ASS TO THE GYM AND STOP MAKING EXCUSES!".

so i packed my gym clothes in my messenger bag and set off to the dentist with the full intent of working out afterwards.

when i was checking out at the dentist, i got a call from my best friend that lives in california. we've known each other since we were 5. she said "hey... what are you doing today?" and told me that she was stuck at DIA for the day. she was supposed to have a 30 minute layover, but her flight out was cancelled and she's in denver until tomorrow morning. so of course i skipped the gym to go pick her up from the airport.

so i always seem to start out with the best intentions and then life happens.

tomorrow, i WILL make it to the gym!

it's big, but not THAT big

2007-12-09T20:19:00.000-07:00

so this chilly sunday night, i'm sitting in my big comfy chair catching up on my blog reading, with a bowl of hamburger helper (lasagna flavor*), watching really bad celebrity tv on VH1.

i had a better night planned, i swear. movie night. 2nd date with the boy, who shall now be named 24phd** who didn't even flinch when we ran into my ex friday night. movie night was his idea, even. and i don't think it's because he's lazy. but this afternoon i received a text from 24phd saying that his boss needs him to work on a grant that is due tomorrow and he's so sorry but he has to go to the lab and can't do movie night.

no biggie. at least i didn't have to clean the house. and we've rescheduled for tomorrow.

at any rate, there is about a foot of space between me and the edge of my big comfy chair. a foot of space that my 85 pound malamute has deluded himself into thinking he can fit into. every time i'm in the chair. i get the paw first.. and the look like "hi mom, whatcha doing? what? i'm just standing here!". then the second paw.. and the third and fourth. so he's standing in the foot of space facing the back of the chair. but he can't just lay down in that position. no, burton likes to be facing the tv, of course. so he turns, sticking his big ass right in my face and tries to lay down sideways, as in across my lap. this doesn't work so well when i also have a computer in my lap (and his ass has automatically sent a few emails before they were ready and shut down a few programs unsaved). so i push him over and he gives me an exasperated sigh and a look that says "will you please move so that i will be more comfortable?" and then kicks me trying to get his legs to fit in the space.

this has become an hourly ritual. because after about 15 minutes, he decides he needs a drink of water or has to go pee or needs to take a toy away from kitsu. then he comes back to resume the position. sometimes kitsu will feel left out and want to join the party too. she usually jumps up and sits on burtons head. i want to get a picture, but once they're in the chair, i'm pretty stuck.

it's nice in the winter though - at least the side of my legs stays warm.

and if you want to see a really cute video of a puppy that could be burton's twin, go here.

*made with almond milk because i'm trying to cut down on my dairy intake after reading "skinny bitch".
**who is of course, 24 yrs old (i like me some young ones!) AND 2 years away from a phd in a ridiculously difficult medical research field.

run in with the ex

2007-12-08T08:39:00.000-07:00

so i'm out on a date last night at the rio, a mexican place with margs so strong that you're only allowed to order 3 of them. total.

this is a first date - someone i met online, of course, and things are going well. we're standing at the bar, and out of the corner of my eye, i see a side profile that looks VERY familiar. it took me a minute and then i realized it was my ex. yeah, the one i was accidently married to.

i didn't know if he had seen me. i hadn't seen him since last december. i had barely talked to him since last december. the last thing i wanted to do was have to make small talk with my date standing right there.

i quickly grab our coats and my purse and whisper "let's go upstairs, quickly, i'll explain in a minute". turning my back so that the ex doesn't see my face.

we get upstairs. i apologize for being about to commit the biggest faux pas one can do on a first date. "you aren't going to believe this. that guy standing next to you at the bar was my ex boyfriend. i haven't talked to him since december. we were married, technically. so i guess he's actually my ex husband. i am so embarrassed"

my date was so cool about it. score a point for him!

while we were chatting upstairs, my ex came upstairs and looked like he was looking for someone. did he see me? he HAD to have seen me. why wasn't he coming to talk to me if he'd seen me?

on my way out, we made eye contact. i acted surpried. "oh my god, i THOUGHT that was you! how have you been?!?". he introduced me to his new friends. i asked about the family. chatted for a couple minutes. gave him a hug and left.

my date was completely unfazed. we danced the rest of the night at another bar and had a wonderful time.

maybe i'll go out with this one again.

tag i'm it again

2007-12-02T20:52:00.000-07:00

i was just tagged by one of my good friends and sorority sister, stacey.

If you have been tagged, please follow these rules:

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.
2. Share 5 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 5 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

so here goes.

1. when i was 4, i pulled the fire alarm in preschool "just to see what happened". the firetrucks came and we all had to line up. i didn't tell my parents, but that night was parent-teacher conference night and the teacher asked them if i had told them what i did at school that day..

2. the tv i watch sometimes can be embarrassing. full house and sabrina the teenage witch reruns. mary kate and ashley movies. even some of the sitcoms on "teen nick". and then i am wistful about being a teenager and wish i was back at that point where life was so simple. then i snap out of it when i remember what high school was REALLY like.

3. i couldn't roll my r's if my life depended on it.

4. i only wash my hair every 2-3 days. it looks better that way. when i let it air dry, it's naturally wavy and now that it's long, i've realized how sexy that is. buh-bye flat iron, i'm going au natural!

5. i sing to my dogs and dance with them.

the following people are tagged:

aarwenn
erin
shannon

i would have had 5, but stacey already tagged me and laurel. i think i need more readers!

fired

2007-12-02T12:24:00.000-07:00

i had never been fired before in my life, until today.

last night i got cut from my shift because i had a "bad attitude". i don't disagree with them, but i talked to the manager about the reasons behind my attitude (we were overstaffed and everyone was bored and not making any money. plus i felt that 2 people were being snappy with me and treating me unfairly - one of those being his wife). i told him that i was stressed with school at the moment and i would change my attitude and hang in there until we got busy again. problem solved, so i thought.

then i get a phone call today saying that he talked it over with his wife and they think it's best to terminate our relationship. WTF? i can't have ONE bad day? ONE bad day which i apologized for? it seems like they were looking for a reason to get rid of me and i'm not sure why. i have never had any other complaints and am one of the best servers they have. the only thing i can think of is that i don't quite fit in with the other staff (all 20 yr old college students that are stoned on the job half the time and like to goof around a lot). i also wasn't afraid to speak my mind when i didn't think things were going well and i don't think they liked that.

i am a little shocked but i'm trying to stay positive and hope it is for the better.

don't sit in my section

2007-12-01T13:37:00.000-07:00

while doing some research for my final project this semester, i came across this disturbing, albeit entertaining blog entry. be sure to read the comments and her replies.

crazy restaurant customer

talk about having some control issues.

lady, here's the thing. you're expecting 5 star service from a 2 star restaurant. you think that just because most people like something, doesn't mean the server should assume YOU like it, and that the server is wasting their time and being inefficient. i think it's more inefficient to not make assumptions about the 99% of customers that would like a refill of the same drink they've been drinking.

and seriously, WHO orders 4 sides of ranch? if you were rude to me for not bringing you enough, i would probably bring out a soup bowl full and sweetly say "is this enough ranch for you ma'am?" so that you would at least look stupid in front of the other customers.

you also state that you don't care about the servers name or the specials. if you so obviously don't care about the server and the restaurant, then why should the server care about you? studies have shown that introducing yourself to the table and telling customers about the specials actually increases the tip percentage.

if i did everything you suggested, i would risk pissing off 99% of my other customers.

if you're so picky about everything, maybe you should stay home and cook your own goddamned food.

perpetual student

2007-11-29T16:57:00.000-07:00

i just did the math and i have 8 more classes to take for my MBA. considering that my company only pays for 1 per semester (and that's about all i have time for!), i won't graduate until 2012!

i think i may have to reconsider this course of action.. and file for an extension.

top ten turn-offs on your online profile

2007-11-29T11:08:00.000-07:00

10. a picture of your car/truck/motorcycle
at 30, i assume that any man i date would have a car or some means of transportation. you don't need to prove it to me before I even meet you. i also do not think that a crotch rocket or harley is sexy, especially if you feel the need to show it off.

9. the word "cuddle" or any variation thereof
this is just cheesy. let's assume that the majority of the people like to cuddle when they're dating. no need to state the obvious. you will probably just attract women who like cuddling more than sex - and then you'll bitch about it.

8. claiming to be into any kind of music. (except rap or country, of course)
this just tells me that you have no taste in music and all my nerdy band rambling will be met with a blank stare and then the statement "well, i really though nicklebacks last album was fantastic!"

7. referring to women as "ladies", or even worse, "ladys" or "lucky lady"
again, CHEESY.

6. raving about a chain restaurant
if you get that excited about the olive garden, i can guarantee that we will not get along.

5. stating your height/weight/hair color/eye color even when it's already listed on the profile
being so OBVIOUS makes you look retarded.

4. proclaiming how active you are "i like to run, mountain bike, row, ski, snowboard, hike, rock climb, swim, play volleyball, and do yoga. i want to meet a girl who can keep up with me".
Do these guys have any idea how many women there are in the world who are this active? Like 10. and i can guarantee that they are too busy to be looking for dates online.

3. complaining about all the places you can't meet women
most people online are there because they are too busy or haven't had luck meeting people at the normal places. you don't need to state it.

2. posting a picture that doesn't clearly show your face
a cute face is much much more important than a nice body. one of the differences between the sexes that will probably never change.

1. wanting your lady to "be comfortable in jeans or an evening gown"
other similar cliches include "i like going out, and also staying in"; "i like listening to music and watching movies". THANK YOU CAPTAIN OBVIOUS. EVERYONE LIKES THESE THINGS. THEY DO NOT MAKE YOU UNIQUE.

root of all evil

2007-11-19T07:49:00.000-07:00

liberty dollars stolen to protect money trust

"The colonies would gladly have borne the little tax on tea and other matters had it not been that England took away from the colonies their money, which created unemployment and dissatisfaction. The inability of the colonists to get power to issue their own money permanently out of the hands of George III and the international bankers was the PRIME reason for the Revolutionary War."
- Benjamin Franklin's autobiography

grounded

2007-11-12T16:11:00.000-07:00

burton used to be so good at the dog park. he'd play with the other pups and there would be no problems.

then last year, i started noticing that he wasn't too fond of boxers. my friend's boxer and him got into it under the kitchen table last year during chrismas dinner. he would sometimes pick fights with other boxers at the dog park.

then one day the doggie day care called me and said that he had started a fight with a bulldog.

in the past few months, i can't take him to the dog park without there being an incident. the other dog is rarely the provoker.

i've talked with our trainer about this, and apparently we aren't to a level in the training that we can take care of it yet. plus it's hard to train because it doesn't happen every time with every dog. it's so unpredictable.

it's hard to come to terms with the fact that your sweet, adorable puppy may be a problem dog. i feel like i'm getting a reputation at the dog park. and that i'm very close to being banned. i'm embarrassed because i know people are talking about us. and they should be. burton has become the agressive dog.

i'm going to feel bad only taking kitsu to the dog park, but unless i can stop whatever is triggering burton, it's just too much of a liability to take him.

a mixed bag

2007-11-07T16:43:00.000-07:00

i'm in salt lake city for work right now. utah. what an interesting state. if i didn't think a city run by a ~~cult~~ church was such a bad idea, i would love to live here.

pro: gorgeous scenery, great weather
con: everything is centered around a temple

pro: light traffic, wide streets
con: street naming convention drives me nuts. south 500 west what?

pro: lots of hot, young guys
con: they're already married with 3 kids

pro: friendly people
con: wholesome mormons

pro: cool downtown area, clean city
con: hard to find a happy hour

pro: microbreweries
con: state records my name if i order a drink. how weird is THAT?

pro: ski areas within 30 minutes of the city
con: hmmm.. no con for this one.

summary:
salt lake - an oasis if you're religious, rasing a family, and like the outdoors.
not ideal for singles, drinkers, and other sinners.

here's a tip

2007-11-04T07:52:00.000-07:00

so i recently took on a second job because:
1) since the divorce, my living expenses have doubled and i've drained my safety cushion so i need more money
2) i was going out and spending way too much money on food and alcohol that my body doesn't need
3) i had too much free time on my hands and was getting lazy
4) if i want my dream of owning a record label to come true, i need to get my debt taken care of and start saving money NOW.

i found a server position with this cute little mom and pop restaurant not too far from my house. family run, great food, good neighborhood joint. i had been a server before in college and always liked it - the client interaction, the exercise, the atmosphere. in the misdt of my nostalgia, i forgot about the cheap customers, endless side work, and aching feet.

i want to start this rant by thanking all the friendly customers who know how to tip and don't run me ragged in the process. also, thank you to those that may run me around a lot, but realize you're doing so and make up for it in the tip. you are the minority, but please know that you are remembered and the level of service that you get each time you come in will only get better. i will remember your names, what kind of wine you like, that you don't care for croutons, and will allow you to order the salmon you love, even though it's not on the menu anymore.

now, for those of you that don't fall into the above category. i have no idea if you're cheap bastards or just clueless, but here is a brief overview of tipping ettiquite as well as some insight into the life of a server.

*anything between 10%-15% is NOT an acceptable tip. when you leave that amount, you are telling the server that they did a bad job. one rare exception - if you don't order any drinks or need a refill on your water, order one simple entree, eat and pay quickly and don't leave a mess, then 10%-15% is understandable, although still a little cheap.

*anything less than 10% is an INSULT. ESPECIALLY when you suck down your drinks like you're in the desert, requiring your server to fill them every 30 seconds, order appetizers, soup (which of course isn't hot enough and can i have more crackers?), salad (no onions, or croutons, extra tomatoes, extra dressing), an entree (with special requests), dessert, coffee (with frequent "warm ups"), sit there for 2 hours, and then tip $6 on a $90 ticket, all while telling me what a great job i am doing for you.

*I AM NOT YOUR SLAVE. I AM MAKING $2.50 AN HOUR AND DEPEND ON YOUR PROPER TIPS FOR MY WAGES. whoever thinks that servers should be paid by their employers need to realize that YES, that SHOULD be the way it is, but it ISN'T so please just deal with it. your food costs would be astronomical if the restaurant was paying it's servers $10-$15 an hour with paid vacation and sick leave and health insurance. when you go to a restaurant, social conventions state that you are agreeing to tip the appropriate amount. If you can't afford to spend at least %15 of your bill to pay your server for all the time she spent with you, then maybe you should order the proper amount of food that will fit into your budget, or not eat out at all.

*did you know that I have to report 8% of my total sales for tax purposes? did you know that i have to tip out the bartender 5% of my tips and the busser 10% of my tips? that $2 you left on a $25 ticket doesn't stretch so far then, does it?

*COUPONS. i love coupons - i use them all the time. HOWEVER, you should tip on the amount of the food BEFORE the coupon is subtracted. i am AMAZED at how many people don't understand this concept! just because you get 50% off of your dinner, does NOT mean that i worked 50% less to serve it to you.

*being old is no excuse for being cheap. there are plenty of old people who know how to tip well. a dollar does not go as far not as it did in yoru day, ma'am. and the sweet little smile and the way you say "and here's a little something extra for you, dear" does not make up for the fact that you tipped me 5%.

*if you're old and you call me sweetheart or dear or honey, i don't mind, really. i know i look young for my age, but i'm nearly 30 and being called "kiddo" by someone in my peer group (especially another woman) is a little insulting.

*please don't be condensending to me. here's a newsflash - most people in the serving industry are working it as their SECOND job. they are in school or an artist or starting their own business or just need a little extra cash. the majority are not stupid or uneducated or working there because they can't get another job. i have a chemical engineering degree, am working on my MBA, and am saving money to start up my own business - what have you done with your life? yeah, that's what i thought. amazing how people change their attitude towards me when they learn that i am actually a successful person.

*being "math-challenged" is not an excuse to leave a bad tip. it is actually very easy to approximate the tip. tax at my restaurant is 8.1%, so if you just take the tax amount and double it, that should be your minimum base. or, you can do what i do, which is take the amount of the ticket, round up to the nearest $5, take 10% and double it (so a $34.54 ticket would be - 10% of $35 = $3.50 x 2 = $7)

and here are some non-tip related tips to make our transaction run smoother.

*if you do have a god-blessed coupon, please present it to me sometime before i give you the bill.

*if you are ready for me to take your payment, please put the credit card in the slot of the folder and put it on the edge of the table so that i can see it. unfortunately, i don't have x-ray vision and if i don't see the credit card sticking out, i will assume that you are not ready to pay yet. if you're paying with cash and want change, let the bills stick out a little bit so i know they're in there.

*if you want a drink refill, please put your glass near the edge of the table so that i can see it better.

*if you are done eating and want me to clear your plate, please put your silverware on top of the plate and put the plate slightly to the side. then i know that you're not still "working on it".

i know it may not seem like it from this rant, but i am actually a very good server! i always have a smile on my face, i don't judge you when you walk in the door (unless you've been in before and i know you're a cheapskate), i keep your drinks refilled, i accomidate any kind of special requests you may have (luckily the chef likes me), and i try to read you to see if you like to joke around or just want to eat and leave. i truely appreciate all the great customers and love serving you guys. i just want to try to get the word out to the people that don't know any better, because it is really frusturating to know that you're doing a really good job and then not get adequately compensated. it seems like this is something that has been the bane of servers everywhere for years and years and years, and for those in the biz, it's something we have to deal with every day.

if you want to read more about the plight of waiters and waitresses everywhere, check out these sites:

stainedapron.com
bitterwaitress.com
waiterrant.blogspot.com

fashion police

2007-07-31T14:29:00.000-06:00

i was in old navy today shopping for some cute tank tops to keep me cool at lollapalooza this weekend. they have this new style called a "trapeze" tank. on the hanger it looks really cute - and i thought it would be the perfect thing to cover up my love handles.

oh. my. god.

cover up my love handles it did.. but it also made me look 8 months pregnant and about 3 sizes bigger all over!

how ironic that the only person that can pull off a shirt like this is a person who has no need to hide any body flaws.

i have enough friends

2007-07-30T13:38:00.001-06:00

which is why i've decided that boys i've dated/hooked up with/wanted to date are no longer going to be allowed inside my circle.

i used to think that it was better to have a guy i was into as a friend than not have him in my life at all. but lately i've realized all it does is drive me crazy. i've noticed that i treat them differently. if a purely platonic guy friend cancels plans with me or can't go out because he has a date, i don't care and think nothing of it. if a non-purely platonic friend does the same thing, i get irritated, sad, and annoyed at them and myself for letting them make me feel that way. having them around reminds me that they didn't want to date me and just makes me feel bad about myself, which is not good for my normally high self esteem. i can't ever get over them because they have a constant presence. and i have to deal with seeing them with other girls, which is pure torture.

so i've decided to hell with them. if they don't want to date me, then they don't get the privilege of being part of my life. is this selfish? probably. but i know that i don't handle jealousy well, and so that should be something that i should avoid bringing into my life.

the 4 worst words in our language

2007-07-15T19:52:00.000-06:00

"let's just be friends"

i have a lot of guy friends. there's a reason for that.
most of them have uttered the 4 words above.

it all goes the same way.
kt, we need to talk about things.
followed by a sad smile.
my heart skips a beat, i think oh crap, and i know exactly what is coming.
you are an amazing girl
i love hanging out with you
you'll find the right guy for you
i really want to keep hanging out with you
i'm just not ready for a girlfriend right now

and i smile at them and tell them i understand and sure, we can be friends. and on the inside i'm thinking.. if i am such a f'ing cool girl, then why the hell don't you want to date me? what is wrong with me? we have fun together. we're attracted to each other. i don't smother you or get jealous or go crazy. your friends like me. i'm honest and caring and supportive and a fantastic girlfriend.

while my heart is being crushed, my head is telling me that it wouldn't have worked out anyway.. you weren't into them; you were worried about his lifestyle anyway; you knew it wasn't going where you wanted..

i'm used to my heart battling my head. i'm just not used to having it lose so often.

otra cerveza por favor

2007-06-28T13:53:00.000-06:00

is what i hope to be saying approximately 27 hours from now.

i'm leaving for playa del carmen tomorrow to enjoy 6 debauchery-filled days and nights with 4 of my single girlfriends.

we're staying here.

all of us have packed enough clothes for a 3 month expedition.

i just hope we come back alive!

why does every guy in colorado snore?

2007-06-24T16:10:00.001-06:00

is it the climate?

or is that why they're single?

so i've met an aboslutely so-adorable-i-almost-can't-stand-it boy that i like a lot. this one i met during every day circumstances - not through the internet or at a bar per my usual routinue. this comes with a whole different set of rules.

i'm trying to let him make the first moves because he's younger than me and i can be a little ~~aggressive~~ enthusiastic sometimes. don't want to scare the poor kid. and the first few weeks are the best anyway, so why rush it? i need to just sit back and have a little patience and enjoy. which paid off last night.

i was getting a little jaded about relationships for awhile. but now i remember how great dating is when you find someone you like and they actually like you back. it reminds me why there are millions of people out there in relationships.

ding ding ding.

and for now, i think the snoring is cute.

emotional rollercoaster

2007-06-21T18:52:00.000-06:00

dating. when it's good it's fantastic, and when it's bad it's awful.

i liked this guy. he liked me. then i wasn't sure. and he wasn't sure. and we decided to just be friends, but maybe date down the road - play it by ear. and we're friends and all is good. so why do i have a pit in my stomach when i find out (not from him) that's he's in a relationship now. i shouldn't care. why do i care? did i like him more than i thought i did? too late now.

at the same time, i have a total crush on another guy. and i think he likes me back. it's at that stage right now where we've hung out a couple of times, nothing has been defined, but something is definitely there. i have the best time when i'm with him and when i'm not with him i think about him and all i can think about is when i'm going to see him again, which drives me nuts because i can't concentrate on anything else. i hate dwelling.

and i want off before i hurl.